I am 24 years old.
I watch professional wrestling.
I know wrestling is fake.
I also know the pain is real.
I remember when Mick Foley fell 15 feet from the top of a cage.
I know not everyone can talk on the stick.
I think it’s more important to tell a story in the ring anyway.
I loved when Hulk passed the torch.
I can’t believe the Warrior dropped the ball.
I watched the first season of Tough Enough.
I remember when Tag Team wrestling meant something in the WWE.
I can smell what the Rock is cooking.
I remember when Vince McMahon was a baby-faced announcer.
I used to love when Jake brought Damien into the ring.
I don’t think the Boogeyman was ever intimidating.
I loved the 1-2-3 Kid.
I think Goldust was one of the best at physiological warfare.
I remember when everyone had a storyline.
I remember when Mark Henry became the proud father of a human hand.
I think Chris Benoit is a monster.
I also think the man is a hell of a wrestler.
I don’t think there will ever be another stable like the Four Horsemen.
I remember the Shock Master.
I remember when Triple H jobbed to Duke the Dumpster Droese.
I once looked up Austin 3:16 in the Bible.
I will never forget Owen’s last match.
I once tried to do “The Worm.”
I don’t like John Cena.
I have nothing but respect for him, though.
I remember when Hogan turned heel.
I think Shane McMahon is one of the more underrated performers in wrestling.
I remember when matches lasted longer than one minute.
I want to see a Too Cool Reunion.
I think the Nexus and the Core are too similar to the NWO.
I want HBK to stay retired.
I think Vince Russo needs to go away forever.
I love the Raw vs. Smackdown video game franchise.
I would still rather play No Mercy on my N64.
I get sad when I see that roster and realize how many wrestlers have passed away.
I miss Eddie.
I think some of you may have enjoyed this article.
I know most of you didn’t.
I’m okay with that.