WWE: The 25 Most Ridiculous Storylines in History
There have been a lot of stories from WWE over the years that have left wrestling fans scratching their heads. Years after the stories have crashed and burned, fans recall them and wonder which poor soul thought it would be a good idea.
We as wrestling fans have been subjected to a lot of ridiculousness. When you hear about the stories that never made it on TV, it just makes the ones that we did see even more ridiculous.
Not only did they like the idea, but they showed some self-control and still thought these storylines would be fine.
Here are just some of the more ridiculous stories in WWE history. I didn't bother ranking them because it's so hard to rank how dumb some of these stories have been.
Before I begin, I also want to say that this is my 50th article with Bleacher Report and I have had so much fun writing these pieces for all of you.
Perry Saturn and Moppy
Perry Saturn came to WWE as a member of The Radicalz, four men who came over from WCW. Saturn saw arguably the least amount of success of the four men.
Both Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrero held world titles in WWE, while Dean Malenko dominated the light heavyweight division.
Saturn did well for himself but is mostly remembered for two things: The Rock calling him cross-eyed and him carrying around a mop as his manager.
Saturn normally had Terri as his valet until his head trauma caught up to him (refrain from the bad taste of Chris Benoit jokes, please).
Saturn began to mistake Terri for a mop he saw backstage and called the cleaning appliance Moppy. To be honest, I can see where Saturn could have confused the two.
Mr. McMahon's Illegitimate Son
Vince McMahon has thrown himself into many awkward storylines over the years. There are the well-documented rumors that McMahon wanted to have an incest storyline between his son and his daughter, as well as a romantic storyline between himself and his daughter.
One of the ideas involving McMahon's family that did make it to TV was the belief that McMahon fathered a child outside of his family. The child just happened to be a boy and just happened to be a wrestler in WWE. How convenient.
Originally believed to be Mr. Kennedy, the change to Hornswoggle is likely thanks to the IWC. A note to all of those who love to dig up spoilers: The creative team likes to keep things under wraps for a reason.
When the payoff of a storyline is spoiled, it often changes to a less reasonable backup. It is likely because of all of this that Hornswoggle is still in WWE.
For those who are confused by this, Katie Vick in the wrestling world is not a member of Michael Vick's extended family. It's just a story line that is in extremely bad taste.
While Kane pursued Triple H's World Heavyweight Championship, an entire story was thought up for Kane's past. Katie Vick was a woman that Kane was supposed to have been romantically involved with until he was present for her tragic death.
This didn't stop with that traumatic experience. Instead, Triple H accused Kane of sexually assaulting Katie Vick's dead body, even going so far as to don a Kane mask and reenact the scene for a shocked WWE Universe.
It has been one of the classic benchmarks of bad storyline ideas. Years later, it has thankfully not been topped in the minds of many wrestling fans.
Hornswoggle as Cruiserweight Champion
This storyline personally angers me. It is just like LayCool breaking the Women's Championship in half before retiring the most prestigious belt in women's wrestling.
Not only did they have Hornswoggle win a match that consisted of every cruiserweight in the company, but they had him be the final Cruiserweight Champion in the history of the company.
His programs with Jamie Noble and Chavo Guerrero were bad enough as they were. When they had him as a champion, and a fighting champion at that, it took every bit of prestige that the belt held and flushed it down the toilet.
Val Venis Gets Castrated
Yes, that picture and title are real.
As Kaientai was becoming prominent in WWE, Val Venis slept with Yamiguchi-San's wife (the woman in the picture). Taka Michinoku, the blue trunks in the photo, tagged with Val Venis, only to turn on him in that match.
Val was dragged into the back and Kaientai attempted to chop off his...well, you know. This was literally the last image seen on an episode of Monday Night RAW in 1998.
The week after, Val said that he was fine due to "a little shrinkage" and made a John Wayne Bobbitt joke. Seriously.
Tim White's Suicide Watch
Tim White was a former WWE referee who injured his shoulder during a Hell in a Cell match. White was forced to retire after returning for WrestleMania XX, only to injure his shoulder once again.
White then opened up a bar in Rhode Island and had a series of segments where he said that the injury ruined his life and that life wasn't worth living.
During interviews with Josh Mathews, White would attempt to off himself, only to find out a week later that his latest attempt was unsuccessful.
Attempts became more and more ridiculous as the weeks went on. There was even one week that White drank a green liquid that was described as "Mad Cow Disease."
The story line, appropriately titled as a web series called "Lunchtime Suicide," finally ended in April 2006 after nearly four months with White shooting Mathews instead of himself.
Mathews was then seldom used for a while before returning to TV normally in 2009 with ECW. By the way, all of this began at Armageddon 2005, about a month after Eddie Guerrero was found dead.
Shane and Vince Vs. HBK and God
WrestleMania 22 was one of the best WrestleManias of the last few years. How could you possibly follow the event up at Backlash? By bringing religion into wrestling, of course.
The Shawn Michaels/McMahon family program was running its course and was going to have a blow-off match at Backlash. It would be Vince and Shane facing the Heartbreak Kid and his partner, God. Yes, THAT God.
I have heard rumblings in the years since this match that WWE tried to land Bret Hart to team with HBK in this situation, only to have it fall through.
Instead, we were treated to weeks of Vince saying that he was more powerful than God and literally went to a church to prove it.
During the match, a beam of light was on to represent God. It was a low point to be a wrestling fan... and a Catholic, for that matter.
Mae Young Births a Hand
Mae Young and Mark Henry together made a lot of people feel uneasy. However, WWE didn't leave that to just be. They had Mae Young be pregnant, which made me throw up in my mouth just now. Then Mae was finally going to have the child.
We all watched in horror as we waited to see a rubber hand the size of an adult be revealed, covered in a weird petroleum jelly-like substance.
It just added to what was perhaps the most confusing story line of this generation.
I actually liked watching Zach Gowen because, unlike many other gimmicky wrestlers I had seen over the years, Gowen was simply a regular wrestler who only had one leg.
Gowen was a better wrestler with just one leg and scrawny arms than some WWE guys now with two legs and huge muscles. Gowen came in as a part of the Mr. America story line, which had a fired Hulk Hogan dressed as a patriotic figure and defy lie detectors to say that he wasn't the Hulkster.
Gowen was given a shot, but was gone rather quickly. The Zach Gowen era had its moments, though, including a feud with Vince McMahon and a scene with Brock Lesnar, who was trying way too hard to show that he was turning heel, push Gowen down a flight of steps while Gowen was in a wheelchair.
I miss Zack Gowen if only for the scenario that could have been at a Royal Rumble. Since you need both feet to hit the ground to be eliminated, could Gowen ever truly lose?
Santino Marella wanted to be in the running for Miss WrestleMania so badly, but couldn't be because she was not a female. The logic seems pretty cut and dry until his sister, Santina, busts onto the scene at WrestleMania, winning the battle royale to crown Miss WrestleMania.
In the weeks that followed, it became a constant story on RAW if Santina and Santino were the same person. They even used CGI to show brother and sister together once Santina had been fired.
I was kind of hoping she would return in the Royal Rumble this year, just to see the moment between her and her brother.
Believe it or not, there is an even worse Divas-related story line later on.
Snitsky Kicks a Baby
Gene Snitsky always said that it wasn't his fault.
Perhaps it was A LITTLE of his fault.
In one of the oddest and most drawn-out story lines of the last decade, Kane won the services of Lita and impregnated her via what was believed to be sexual assault. Lita, not wanting the child, was being protected by Kane so that she could continue the pregnancy.
However, on one episode of RAW, Lita was knocked off the ring while Kane fought Snitsky in a match. The pregnancy was terminated as a result of it, prompting Snitsky's creepiest promo ever.
Snitsky would come to the ring with a baby in a blanket, saying it wasn't his fault that Lita fell and that it was an accident.
What better way to show that you didn't mean to have someone lose their child than to punt a baby doll into the crowd on live television? I totally get it.
Kane Vs. Kane
They say that you are your own worst enemy. What better way to show that than to face yourself at a pay-per-view? That's what Kane did when he was haunted by someone dressed in his former attire.
The entire story was just odd to see, especially because the Kane impostor looked little like the original gimmick and everyone acted as if there were literally two Kanes.
If by some act of magic, the old Kane had somehow traveled to the future to fight himself.
The story line ended abruptly with Kane throwing his old self out and taking his mask back. Was this all to lead up to him remasking himself? Nope. That would have been the only good thing to come out of that.
Fake Razor Ramon and Fake Diesel
What does a company do when two of their more popular stars leave for the rival WCW? Keep the gimmicks and recast the roles. That's what WWE did when Scott Hall and Kevin Nash left the company.
In a legal sense, the characters of Razor Ramon and Diesel were still property of WWE. This was when two men were brought in to purposely be bad interpretations of the gimmicks.
They looked almost nothing like the original act and were used for Jim Ross to turn heel and make fun of Vince McMahon for not holding onto his talent.
The fans quickly got sick of heel JR, as well as the fake duo. Despite getting a tag team title shot, Fake Razor and Fake Diesel were quickly gone.
The man who was Fake Diesel would be repackaged into The Undertaker's brother, Kane.
Big Boss Man Forces Al Snow to Eat Dog
After activists protested an Al Snow action figure with his sidekick, a female mannequin named Head, Snow changed to a chihuahua named Pepper. Snow said that, much like Head, Pepper communicated with him and told him what to do.
The Big Boss Man then got involved, stealing Pepper and challenging Snow to a match to get him back. Snow was not successful, which prompted one of the odder moments of the early Smackdown days.
Snow was invited to Big Boss Man's hotel room, where they were going to talk about the situation. Snow was served a meal during the process and would later find out that Al Snow was tricked into eating Pepper. I can't imagine activists not being outraged at that...
Vince McMahon Explodes
We have seen fake deaths in wrestling before (See: The Undertaker). However, Mr. McMahon's exploding limo was met with good emotions at first. This meant that Vince McMahon was taking himself off of television forever.
A three-hour RAW was planned for the next week to have a "memorial" for Vince. However, something else happened: Chris Benoit passed away.
Suddenly, the plans were altered to have Vince in an empty arena talking about real life and entertainment. After more details came out, Vince appeared on ECW to say that Benoit would not be remembered anymore.
The week after was back to McMahon's "funeral" and a ringing of the bell 10 times, which was the most awkward fake death in WWE history, especially after fans were so shocked to find out details of Chris Benoit.
Shelton Benjamin's Momma
Shelton Benjamin, one of the most athletic wrestlers at the time, was in the middle of a losing streak. He also had a hard time on the microphone, which prompted WWE to give him a manager of sorts: his storyline momma.
Shelton's Momma did a worse job at being Shelton's mother than Martin Lawrence would have done if he was Big Momma.
She would also be often useless when around freaks like Viscera and Goldust. Eventually, Shelton ditched his momma and went on to...well, nothing more than he had done already.
Jillian Hall's Face
We have a hot blonde Diva debuting as JBL's manager in his Cabinet faction. However, to make her stick out from the other hot blonde Divas, she needed something that would be different.
That weird thing on her cheek, which looks like part of a cat's brain, was just plain stupid.
It looked so fake from the beginning and they just kept showing the stupid thing. Finally, they got rid of it, but only by having The Boogeyman bite it off.
What was even odder was that Jillian's cheek underneath was perfectly fine. A medical miracle, if you ask me.
Jim Ross's Colon Surgery
It was seven of the strangest minutes in wrestling during the year of 2005. Jim Ross was fired in storyline by the McMahons, but it gave him a time to receive medical attention for a problem with his colon. WWE decided to take that chance by making way too many fart jokes.
Vince was the surgeon and pulled out various objects out of JR, including his BBQ sauce and an Oklahoma football helmet. There was even a Mae Young hand reference made.
In the end, they pulled out a head that resembled JR, complete with hat and glasses, simply to make the joke that he had his head up his ass.
Throw in some random JR soundbytes and you will have one of the stranger and unnecessary segments in RAW history, especially when Ross was going through a real-life medical problem.
William Regal Ruins RAW
William Regal was made the RAW General Manager and proceeded to try and abuse his power like so many that have come before him. Regal practically rigged the King of the Ring tournament to have him win and force himself into feuds with main eventers.
Regal had no business feuding with the likes of these wrestlers, but it was still okay. However, Regal let his anger get the best of him and literally took RAW off the air.
Regal has been a commissioner in the WWE prior so you would think that Regal would show more professionalism than he did.
It may not be as ridiculous as some others, but Regal becoming GM for the sole purpose of pushing himself is just stupid.
Heidenreich was a psychopath that pretty much did what he wanted when he wanted to. In this infamous backstage scene, Heidenreich trapped Michael Cole backstage and it was alluded to the fact that he had his way with Cole.
It remains to be the one thing that Heidenrich is remembered for in the minds of wrestling fans. Cole, on the other hand, was never the same. Although, Michael Cole was never really great as it was.
This still angers many wrestling fans. Wrestlers have been given stutters and speech impediments for years, but none have been more misplaced than that of Matt Morgan, one of the diamonds in the rough at the time.
In need of a gimmick for him, they made him take minutes to pronounce words. It's no wonder why Morgan decided to leave WWE and become a star in TNA.
WWE definitely dropped the ball on this one.
Rey and Eddie Fight for Dominick
The custody of Rey Mysterio's son, Dominick, was a very long and drawn out storyline. For weeks, Eddie Guerrero teased the idea of there being a secret that Rey didn't want revealed.
It was obvious from the start that they were talking about Eddie being Dominick's real father, which was odd considering that Dominick was not an actor used for the storyline. It was really Rey's son.
There's nothing that can confuse a young boy than to have a close family friend tell you that they are your dad.
It also wasn't specified if Dominick was simply given to the Mysterios from Eddie and Vickie, or if there was the situation of Eddie knocking up Rey's wife. The storyline was just too dragged out and too real in certain points.
Although, the idea that the custody of a child, which is a court matter, could be decided in a ladder match is just crazy. Also, in retrospect, can anyone look at that kid and tell me he doesn't look exactly like his father?
And you thought that Lay-Cool was a low point in the history of WWE Divas wrestling?
Harvey Wippleman dressed up as Hervina and competed in a Women's Title match against the champion, The Kat. The idea that an inflatable swimming pool filled with snow is suitable for a title match was the showing of the times.
Not only did Wippleman win the title, but when it was revealed that he was a man, he held onto the belt.
Wippleman only won the belt with help from Jacqueline, to whom he lost the championship weeks later.
Anonymous RAW General Manager
It has become way too drawn out of a story line. Originally, the general manager was anonymous and communicated via e-mail to protect their identity.
Then there were short-lived moments where Edge and Chris Jericho were going to find out who the GM was. There was even a moment when the computer used spoken word to communicate.
Fans have been waiting for months to just find out who the GM is and have the stupid computer unplugged.
To WWE Creative, and I quote: "stop this storyline now."
Dawn Marie and Al Wilson
I know that there are some who love the Torrie Wilson/Dawn Marie scene that this story line brought us. However, we have to all agree that this storyline was plain stupid.
First, Dawn Marie meets Torrie Wilson's real father, Al. She falls for him, which Torrie doesn't like. Then, Dawn tells Torrie that she is developing feelings for her and they share a kiss.
Then, Dawn says that if Torrie goes to her hotel room that she will call off the wedding with Al Wilson. Torrie goes and there is a long scene in a hotel room with the two. Al Wilson will marry Dawn Marie...in their underwear.
The story line then goes that Al Wilson died after rigorous sex during the honeymoon. Torrie tries to avenge her father's "death" and defeats her stepmother. This was dragged out over nine months.