NFL Week Three: The Games Nobody Wants to Watch

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NFL Week Three: The Games Nobody Wants to Watch

The NFL schedule this week is full of yawners. Bad teams pitted against bad teams make for bad football. Which are the worst this week? I thought you'd never ask.

 

Detroit Lions at San Francisco 49ers

These two teams have been the model of putridity in the NFL the past few years. Detroit still looks to be, while San Francisco has made some strides this season with J.T. O'Sullivan(?) at quarterback.

Frank Gore looks to be back in peak fantasy-production form, averaging 4.8 yards per carry and with two touchdowns. O'Sullivan is flourishing, relatively speaking, in San Francisco, while former quarterback of the future Alex Smith sits on injured reserve while waiting (and, perhaps, hoping) for his walking papers.

Detroit is still the same old Detroit. Poor management and coaching, no running game, high-cost wide receivers that haven't lived up to billing, and an awful defense.

The Lions fell behind 21-0 in each of their two games, once to Green Bay and once to Atlanta. I have to give credit where some is due though; they fought back admirably against a Packer defense that fell asleep in the third quarter. 

 

Kansas City Chiefs at Atlanta Falcons

Atlanta got the skunk out of the win column early this year, beating Detroit on opening weekend. Matt Ryan showed promise and running back Michael Turner had a big game, but I'll say it again: They beat Detroit.

Against Tampa Bay, Ryan struggled the way rookie quarterbacks are supposed to struggle against superior defensive strategy. The franchise got destroyed by Michael Vick, but the Falcons are taking steps toward a brighter future.

Still, I'm putting the over/under of fans in the Georgia Dome at 10,000 for this game Sunday. When the Falcons aren't winning, they aren't drawing. And they haven't been winning.

Neither have the Chiefs. The only thing of note Kansas City has done this season is destroy poor Tom Brady's left knee.

Projected as one of the worst teams in the NFL this season, Kansas City has lived up to the hype. They rank 29th in points scored with nine per game, and they have allowed 213 rushing yards per game defensively, good for 31st in the league.

Opening day starter Brodie Croyle injured his shoulder during the game against New England, leaving Damon Huard and some kid named Tyler Thigpen to orchestrate the offense. Yikes.

At least they have Larry Johnson, right?  Wrong. Johnson is averaging under three yards per carry and is convinced that Head Coach Herm Edwards will start giving more carries to the young Jamaal Charles. It can't get much worse though...Right?

 

St. Louis Rams at Seattle Seahawks

Oh, yes it can get worse! The Chiefs could be the Rams.

They've averaged only eight points and 183.5 total yards offensively through their first two games this season. And before you think it can't possibly get worse than the St. Louis offense, you have to look at the defensive numbers.

The Rams have allowed 39.5 points per game, 481.5 yards per game, 327.5 passing yards per game, and 154 rushing yards per game. The first three numbers are all league-worst, and the rushing yards per game ranks 27th.

But St. Louis isn't even in last place in their division. Seattle is.

It's a little foreign to talk about the Seahawks in a negative context because they've been a good team for a pretty long time, but it's just not coming together this year. 

Injuries have decimated the wide-receiving corps, which has resulted in only a 174.5 yards per game passing average. Normally superb Matt Hasselbeck has completed less than 50 percent of his passes and only has one touchdown against teams they would've beaten in past years.

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