Natalie Gulbis: 10 Reasons We Will Miss Her Being Single
Natalie Gulbis, easily one of the hottest female athletes in the known universe, is reportedly in a relationship with fellow golfer Dustin Johnson.
Sure, Johnson is one of the great young players on the PGA Tour, but we're still curious what he has that the rest of us don't.
Indeed, this is sad news. And we're going to deal with it the only way we know how: with a sexy slideshow.
Here are 10 reasons why we will miss Natalie Gulbis being single.
10. No More Awesome Stretches?
Watching Natalie Gulbis stretch is one of the great joys in life, a notion that you will no doubt agree to immediately thanks to the picture on the left side of your screen.
Now that she's off the market, we just can't help but fear that stretches such as these might become a little more infrequent.
We don't know why, but we just do.
Are you sharing our worst fear yet?
9. Out of the Public Eye?
Throughout seemingly her whole career, you didn't have to watch an LPGA event in order to see Natalie Gulbis.
Indeed, all you had to do was look around. She did her own sexy calender (more on that in a moment), she had a reality TV show, she was in video games and she was even on Celebrity Apprentice.
Now that Natalie is apparently getting "serious," as they say, does that mean she's not going to be as readily available?
I hope not...
8. She Plays Better Single
I'm just going to assume that the reason Natalie Gulbis enjoyed the most success in her career in 2006 and 2007 was because she was no longer with Ben Roethlisberger.
Indeed, the couple broke up in May of 2005. And in 2006-2007, Natalie had one win, two second-place finishes, and two third-place finishes.
What can I say? Somebody has to worry about the effect this relationship might have on her career.
7. Fewer Single Women in the LPGA
Of all the hotties of the LPGA, Natalie Gulbis was more or less the last hope.
Indeed, Anna Rawson is engaged, Minea Blomqvist is married, and when last I checked, Beatriz Recari was off the market.
And now so is Natalie. It's kind of like when one of your closest friends from high school announces that she/he is getting married, and you are suddenly aware of how horribly single you are.
Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about.
6. Does This Mean No More Calendars Too?
Yes, I still have my Natalie Gulbis calendar. Don't you?
Sure, because it's a calendar for the year 2005, it's basically useless. But still, it holds a certain, shall we say, sentimental value.
But if the USGA was pissed off enough about that calendar to ban it from the U.S. Women's Open that year, then one suspects that Dustin will also have his say in the event that Natalie chooses to do another sexy calendar.
As for Mr. Johnson...
5. Now We Have to Hate Dustin Johnson
Let's get something straight: I like Dustin Johnson. He's a good golfer, and he's got a lot of things I don't have (namely talent and money).
But now that he's dating Natalie Gulbis, well, I for one hate his guts.
Call it envy all you want. After all, it is envy.
4. These Pictures Could Be Relics
It already seemed like Natalie was less interested in putting her beautiful figure on display, and more interested in playing golf, in the last couple years.
As such, you could say that these pictures were already a thing of the distant past.
Now that she's in a serious relationship, they may as well be ancient artifacts.
3. Still a Sex Symbol?
In a time when seemingly every LPGA star is simultaneously trying to be a sex symbol, nobody did it better than Natalie Gulbis.
Now that she's off the market, you could argue that she is less of a sex symbol pretty much by default.
And that's just not cool.
2. We Can't Kid Ourselves Anymore
As with any other single woman out there, when it came to Natalie Gulbis, there was always a chance.
True, some of you might still think you have a chance with Natalie. But I suppose I'm just not the delusional type.
Besides, how the hell can bums like you and me hope to top both Ben Roethlisberger and Dustin Johnson?
Okay fine, maybe Big Ben...
1. Potential to Get Worse
Now that Natalie and Dustin are in a relationship, how long will it be before someone utters the "M" word.
If so, how long will it be before she retires, has kids, and dare we say it, gets old?
Well, just thinking about that makes me realize just how truly special the single Natalie Gulbis really was.