WWE Universe: Dear Ashley Is Coming, Real Life Problems Solved by WWE Superstars

Double A .Correspondent IIMarch 11, 2011

SATIRE—Hello Fellow Wrestling Enthusiasts,

It is I, the all powerful, all knowing woman behind the curtain here to help you with your day to day problems the WWE way.  

Have a problem that needs solving? Always wondered what the Undertaker would do if he was in your shoes? Look no further as I dress up in my favorite wrestling merchandise, snap into a slim jim, and consult my mystical WWE Magic 8-ball to bring you the answers you seek. 

Now, some of you naysayers may be wondering, "Ashley, what makes you qualified? How do you know what HHH would do if his neighbor kept letting his dog crap on The Game's lawn?" To that I say, "It doesn't matter how I know. He'd flex his muscles, spit some water in the air, shake a sledge hammer at the guy and keep on trucking"

The time of spiritual unrest and upheaval on B/R has called me back home to bring peace and...ummm...other flowery niceties back to the site by offering my fellow bleachers my superior knowledge.

All you need to do to participate in this daring venture is message me or comment here, with your name, favorite superstar, and a problem that needs solving.  What could be better?

I will post the Q&A on Sunday, March 13, 2011.  Be warned, I will not keep your identity anonymous, as I am unwilling to take the fall for weird, perverse, or ridiculous questions.

I look forward to sharing my knowledge with you IWC...Dear Ashley is here.