Step 1: The Bengals trade Chad Javon Ocho-Cinco to another team, a team on which there is another player that wears number 85. Preferably, this player is a relative unknown. Not a superstar like David Tyree. No, someone we've never heard of.
Step 2: No matter what C.J.O-C. offers, this unknown player (we'll call him DeBob) will not relinquish his number. The artist formerly known as Johnson can offer his entire salary, but DeBob shan't budge.
Step 3: Fans laugh.
I love it. The only thing more entertaining than Ocho-Cinco's antics is someone pulling the same schtick. The man runs his mouth, jumps into opposing team fan-mobs, races horses, and legally changes his name to his nickname. How amazing would his reaction be if someone did this to him? Oh, how delicious!
Plus, I'd like to see a rash of Ocho-Cincos pop up. Calvin Ocho-Cinco, Randy Ocho-Cinco, and Brad Ocho-Cinco, just to name a few. I'd even allow good old Kenny Jonnson to participate in the name game.
Seriously though, his parents must be so proud of him. Mr. and Mrs. Ocho-Cinco have truly raised a fine young man.
A Plan For Chad Ocho-Cinco
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1 comments Last one added 10 months ago — Leave a Comment
Luke Jones 10 months ago
I used to actually like Chad Johnson, but this name change is ridiculous. The Ocho Cinco nickname was funny when it first came out, but to actually change his name to that is ridiculous. I think it's more idiotic than funny. It's such a me-first act and takes away from the rest of the team, especially after he was saying how he didn't want to return to Cincinnati. I used to love his stunts, but I think he has become a parody of himself.
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