A. I hope FSU and Miami come back to glory...sorta. I mean, I don't want them perennial top five, but it feels weird with them being so bad. Plus it gives UF too many recruits. Bobby Bowden is a great guy, even if he needs to go. As much as I hate Miami, Randy Shannon has an amazing story and deserves some success.
B. I hope that Bobby Petrino fails...at life...and that Arkansas joins the Big 12.
C. I hope that they replace Dave Wannstedt with Tom Selleck during the middle of a game and no one notices. Then like three games later, some reporter says, "Hey aren't you that guy from 3 Men and a Baby?" and he replies "Yeah. So what? No more questions for me, from now on direct your questions to assistant coach Guttenberg."
14. I hope Kansas stays pretty good—it helps the Big 12. I also hope that Mark Mangino loses a lot of weight. I mean, I love to make fun of the great Mangina as much as anyone, but seriously, that's unhealthy and he could die very easily. I'm completely serious when I say I hope he gets some help.
15. I hope ASU's Rudy Carpenter talks trash about Texas before every game. We saw how well that worked out for us. Plus I hope someone actually challenges USC for the conference.
16. I hope BYU doesn't crash the party.
17. I hope Sean Glennon and VT are very successful. Embattled, criticized QBs make me sad. I like a lot of things about people involved with the VT program. I wish them success. I also think that even though the shooting was a couple years ago, the VT fans deserve good feelings—and if football can provide that, more power to them!
18. I hope Tennessee gets sued by the makers of the Dreamsicle for using their colors. After losing that part of their identity, they also make the decision to no longer be referred to as UT, because of the confusion with Texas and the fear that Texas might female-dog-slap them too. On a positive note, I hope Phil Fulmer sues the state of Alabama and wins. SEC media day was bush league, 'Bama.
19. I hope USF's fans realize they haven't actually had that much success on the field yet and decide to shut up until then.
20. I hope that there's a limit on how many times an announcer can say "The Juice is loose" during an Illinois game.
I mean, I hope it's said at least once, but after that the co-anchor or whatever they're called should just be really disgusted and say something like, "Seriously? You're gonna go there? All that education and that's what you come up with? You're so white." "What? I'm not white! Mike Tirico





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