New York Yankees' Possible Season Outcomes

They win the East easily, cruise through the playoffs, and by some loophole win the World Series in three games—don't ask me how. It is tough to explain.

Likeliness Rating: Doubtful (Hey, you never know)

Fourth Scenario: Nightmare (fantasy/maybe reality)

The Yankees lose 40 of their next 42 games, while their whole pitching staff goes on the DL, forcing them to start bullpen guys and minor league call-ups.

A-Rod still manages to put up good numbers, posting all of his HRs and RBI only when the Yankees are down by double digits. Derek Jeter requests a trade, stating, "I want to play for a winner for once," baffling the New York media and fans, and ultimately accepting a trade to the Washington Nationals.

Steinbrenner sells the team to a man with mob-related ties, who ultimately changes the name to the Bronx Money Launderers, but claims they don't even play baseball but run a legitimate dry cleaning business in the tri-state area.

Likeliness Rating: Improbable

Fifth Scenario: The "Somehow Carl Pavano Wins" Scenario

Carl Pavano gets activated from the DL just in time to bolster a struggling Yankee rotation. During his first start, he gets into some trouble in the first inning and starts to hear the boo birds, but eventually settles down.

The Yanks and Pavano go on to win that game, the first of many for Carl in September. He is somehow able to go 4-0, with two key wins against the Rays, and one against the Red Sox, and the Yankees make the postseason.

There, Pavano again pitches well, earning four wins, and one of the Yankees' wins in the World Series, where they lose to the Cubs, four games to three. Pavano showed many teams that he could still pitch in the majors after Tommy John surgery, among other injuries.

The Yankees do not opt to resign him, but he gets many other offers from other teams, ultimately signing with the Red Sox for $35 million.

During his press conference announcing the signing, Pavano strains his mouth muscles from saying "cha-ching" so many times that he is forced to go on the DL for the rest of the season. He goes to bed later that night on a pile full of money next to a supermodel girlfriend.

Likeliness Rating: High (some people have all the luck)

And finally, the Sixth Scenario: WWE

The Yankees make it to the ALCS, where they are facing the Red Sox in Game Seven:

We are live from Fenway Park, tied in the bottom of the ninth with Mariano Rivera pitching, Jim Ross has the call...

"Here we are folks, in the shadow of the green monster, and it sure has been a slobberknocker thus far. We are tied here at 2-2, and the Red Sox have a runner on second.

"Mariano delivers AND IT'S A WILD PITCH, PEDROIA TO THIRD PEDROIA TO THIRD. OH MY GOD! But no runs score, Rivera settles down and delivers ANOTHER WILD PITCH, IT WAS IN THE SAME SPOT AS THE OTHER ONE, ALMOST 50 FEET IN THE AIR OVER THE UMPIRE'S HEAD, RIVERA PLANNED THIS, PEDROIA SCORES AND, WHAT'S THIS?

"MARIANO RIVERA IS TAKING OFF HIS YANKEE JERSEY TO REVEAL A RED SOX JERSEY! THAT S.O.B! THAT TWO-TIMING PUNK! WITH ALL THIS YOU HAVE TO WONDER WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN IN THE WORLD SERIES?! GOODNIGHT EVERYBODY!"

Likeliness Rating: High if Fenway Park decides to add a "Hell in the Cell" to the outfield

So there you have it folks, those are the ways the Yankees season could be coming to an end. Let's all hope for the best but prepare for the worst, as it could be a long offseason for the boys in pinstripes.

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