Troy Polamalu and The 20 Most Insurable Body Parts In Sports

By (Featured Columnist) on August 31, 2010

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DENVER - AUGUST 29:  The name on the back of the jersey of safety Troy Polamalu #43 of the Pittsburgh Steelers is obscured by his hair as he defends against the Denver Broncos during preseason NFL action at INVESCO Field at Mile High on August 29, 2010 in
Lloyds of London has insured these locks for $1 million.
Doug Pensinger/Getty Images

It was recently revealed that Troy Polamalu's hair was insured for $1 million by Head and Shoulders shampoo (he's a spokesman for them) through Lloyd's of London.

This got me thinking about other trademark hairstyles, or signature body parts that should be insured. So, I bring you the 20 most insurable body parts in all of sports. 

20. Stephen Strasburg's Arm

Oh... Wait. Never Mind.
Oh... Wait. Never Mind.
Greg Fiume/Getty Images

Oh... wait, MOST insurable? Nevermind then, let's just move on before the Nationals' one diehard fan lights themself on fire. 

20. Rafael Nadal's Hair

DOHA, QATAR - JANUARY 06:  Rafael Nadal of Spain with the 2008 year end number one trophy after his match with Fabrice Santoro of France during the Exxon Mobil Qatar Open Tennis on January 6, 2009 in Doha, Qatar.  (Photo by Julian Finney/Getty Images)
Julian Finney/Getty Images

Nadal's hair can best be described as "I haven't bathed in two months, that's not a problem, is it?" Having seen his hair up close, I can tell you that it ALWAYS looks like that. Even right after a shower. Without it, Rafa isn't Rafa. 

19. Imogen Thomas' Boobs

Odds are good that right now, Thomas is on a date with a footballer.
Odds are good that right now, Thomas is on a date with a footballer.

I don't know who she's dating, but odds are, it's an English football player. She seems to like them, and they dig her. I can't imagine why. 

18. Roger Federer's Hair

Roger wouldn't be Roger without that signature do.
Roger wouldn't be Roger without that signature do.
Bryan Bedder/Getty Images

Roger just isn't the same without whatever he calls his hair style. I was thinking of going with his arm here, but his hair is so unique, it deserves a spot on this list. 

17. Simona Halep's Boobs

Lest we ever forget what was.
Lest we ever forget what was.

I know, Simona Halep had breast reduction surgery because they were hurting her back. But this page will serve as a memorial to some of tennis' most epic boobs of all time. 

16. Kim Kardashian's Curves

Miles Austin agrees that Kim's got some dangerous curves.
Miles Austin agrees that Kim's got some dangerous curves.

When you've got two assets to choose from, why not use both? The Cowboys' most famous WAG certainly has enough in two places to insure both. 

15. Tim Lincecum's Arm

SAN FRANCISCO - JULY 15:  Tim Lincecum #55 of the San Francisco Giants pitches against the New York Mets in the second inning at AT&T Park on July 15, 2010 in San Francisco, California.  (Photo by Ezra Shaw/Getty Images)
Ezra Shaw/Getty Images

I could very easily have gone with his hair here. But Lincecum's delivery and scrawny little arm combine to get so much heat on a baseball, he needs to get it insured. 

14. Tom Brady's Chin

INDIANAPOLIS - NOVEMBER 15: Quarterback Tom Brady #12 of the New England Patriots watches from the sidelines in the fourth quarter of the game against the Indianapolis Colts at Lucas Oil Stadium on November 15, 2009 in Indianapolis, Indiana. The Colts won
Andy Lyons/Getty Images

That dimple is both epic and iconic. Without it, I don't think Brady has the charisma to bag both Bridget Moynahan and Gisele Bundchen. But with it? He can do anything. 

13. Prince Fielder's Gut

ATLANTA - JULY 15:  Prince Fielder #28 of the Milwaukee Brewers against the Atlanta Braves at Turner Field on July 15, 2010 in Atlanta, Georgia.  (Photo by Kevin C. Cox/Getty Images)
Kevin C. Cox/Getty Images

I could have just as easily gone with that ridiculous beard. But the gut is epic. This man is a professional athlete! How is that even possible? He looks like he's carrying a second person under there!

12. Ana Ivanovich's Smile

Sure she's pretty. But that smile is her meal ticket.
Sure she's pretty. But that smile is her meal ticket.

Ana Ivanovich would be pretty without her smile. But with it, even the oldest, surliest, most curmudgeonly sports writer can't help but go "Awwww." It turns her into the girl next door. It's her meal ticket.

11. Thomas Jones' Legs

SAN DIEGO - JANUARY 17:  Running back Thomas Jones #23 of the New York Jets runs with the ball against the San Diego Chargers during the AFC Divisional Playoff Game at Qualcomm Stadium on January 17, 2010 in San Diego, California.  (Photo by Robert Laberg
Robert Laberge/Getty Images

Thomas Jones' legs have turned him into a borderline Hall of Fame candidate, through their longevity and power. He's still churning out 1,200 yard seasons at age 32, when most running backs have given up the ghost.

If the Jets had kept him instead of releasing him and picking up the corpse of LaDainian Tomlinson, maybe he'd give us a 1,500-yard season this year. 

10. Arizona State's Student Body

Asu3_display_image

So it's not an athlete's body. They were chosen as the hottest student body on this very website. Are you going to argue?

9. Ben Wallace's Afro

ATLANTA - FEBRUARY 9:  Ben Wallace (Detroit Pistons) #3 of the Eastern Conference All-Stars looks on during the 2003 NBA All-Star Game on February 9, 2003 at Philips Arena in Atlanta, Georgia.  The West won in double overtime 155-145.  NOTE TO USER:  User
Jed Jacobsohn/Getty Images

This thing was EPIC back in the day. Now? We don't see it nearly often enough. It's time to fix that, Ben. 

8. Logan Tom's Legs

They just kind of go on forever.
They just kind of go on forever.
Steve Grayson/Getty Images

They just sort of go on forever. They don't really have an end. They should be insured. 

7. Eva Longoria's Smile

Without her smile, you wouldn't remember her.
Without her smile, you wouldn't remember her.

Without her smile, Eva probably wouldn't be a WAG. With it? She's one of the most beautiful women in the world.

6. Manny Ramirez's Brain

ST. LOUIS - JULY 18: Manny Ramirez #99 of the Los Angeles Dodgers looks on from the dugout against the St. Louis Cardinals at Busch Stadium on July 18, 2010 in St. Louis, Missouri.  The Cardinals beat the Dodgers 5-4.  (Photo by Dilip Vishwanat/Getty Imag
Dilip Vishwanat/Getty Images

Without it, Manny isn't Manny. He's boring. With it? He's the craziest player in baseball, hands down. 

5. Gina Carano's Abs

Speaks for itself.
Speaks for itself.

Do I need to say anything? No.

4. Troy Polamalu's Hair

DENVER - NOVEMBER 09:  Brandon Marshall #15 of the Denver Broncos makes a reception and it stopped by Troy Polamalu #43 of the Pittsburgh Steelers on during NFL action at Invesco Field at Mile High on November 9, 2009 in Denver, Colorado. The Steelers def
Doug Pensinger/Getty Images

With his hair up, he's mild mannered Troy. But when it comes down, he turns into a force of nature, delivering some of the most crushing hits in the NFL. Hence why he's in the top five. 

3. Stephanie Rice's Boobs

They make her unique.
They make her unique.

In a sport full of women without much mass in the upper torso region, Aussie swimmer Stephanie Rice brings quite a bit to the table. They're what make her stand out from the rest of the successful swimmers from Australia, and there are tons of them.

2. Natalie Gulbis' Boobs

Umm.... yeah.
Umm.... yeah.

Now if only she'd win something. Although, no one seems to mind that at all. 

1. Serena Williams' Butt

FLUSHING, NY - AUGUST 28: Detail, Serena Williams in action against Dinara Safina of Russia during the US Open on August 28, 2002 at the USTA National Tennis Center in Flushing Meadows Corona Park in Flushing, New York.  (Photo by Gary M. Prior/Getty Imag
Gary M. Prior/Getty Images

Yeah. I don't need to say anything. It's clear why she's ranked first on this list...

1. Serena Williams: More Proof

Serena-williams_display_image

I rest my case. 

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