The Last Shot

Wayne TestoriCorrespondent IIAugust 30, 2010

The Last Shot

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    The Last Shot takes a satirical aim at the athletes and events making news in the world of sports.

    This week - Extracurricular Sideline Activities.

Press Zero For Ochocinco

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    Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chad Ochocinco was fined $25,000 for tweeting while on the sideline.  Believe it or not, Chad is not the first athlete to be distracted by their other personal pursuits, during a game.

    See for yourself …

Mr. Bedazzler

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    Even though it drove Billy Martin insane, New York Yankee great Reggie Jackson would occupy his time between innings creating fabulous designs with his Bedazzler.

Eco-Erection

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    During every commercial break, Fox analyst and Extenze spokes-dude Jimmy Johnson, rushes down to the network’s laboratory to work on his life-long dream of building the first solar-powered penile implant.

Star Attraction

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    Between 100 meter heats, world record holder Usain Bolt likes to explore the cosmos in search of a life force that has an even bigger ego than his.

Flower Power

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    Former Boston Red Sox and budding horticulturist Bill Buckner found internal solace taking time out between pitches to nurture his beloved first base garden.

    NOTE: Buckner still insists that it was sprouting gardenia that caused him to boot Mookie Wilson’s game six groundball.

Mind Over Mascot

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    When not annoying, I mean, entertaining the fans, the Phillie Phanatic takes a moment to engage in the ancient, spiritual ritual of meditation.

    This peaceful time allows him to reflect on what his life would be like if he wasn’t such a constant disappointment to his former life-coach, Rainbow Man.