Another Season, Another Yawn: College FB's Most Mediocre Teams

Jux Berg by Columnist Written on December 04, 2007
Sheets

Icon Sports MediaIt seems like every season, the same college football teams get hyped without ever producing.

These mediocre squads show some flashes early in the season, then fade faster than Ben Grieve—remember him?—when the schedule gets tough.

Here’s a list of the most frequent offenders...

 

Purdue

How does Joe Tiller still have his job?

Tiller's record against ranked teams is atrocious. Since 2003, he's 0-17 against the Top 25.

The Boilermakers annually bust through a nonconference schedule that’s weaker than their cheerleaders, then get smacked around like Paris Hilton should as soon as they run into teams with winning records.

Do me a favor, pollsters—do not rank Purdue next year until they beat a good team.

 

IconClemson

A contract extension for Tommy Bowden? For what, exactly?

Has he won the ACC championship?

Uh, no.

Oh, well he's at least won his division, right?

Nope.

So what has Bowden done to warrant his new deal?

Oh yeah, he has gone a blistering 60-38 since taking the helm at Clemson. Everyone bow down!

He has won some enormous, life-altering bowl games too: the Humanitarian Bowl, the Peach Bowl, and the all-important Champs Sports Bowl.

Let’s not mention that he lost the gauntlet known as the Music City Bowl last season, or the minefield known as the Tangerine Bowl back in 2002.

Let’s just focus on the positives. Oh, wait...

 

Georgia

Why do I have the Bulldogs on this list? They were in the national title talk this season, weren't they?

Georgia is here because Mark Richt’s boys seem to begin every season in or near the Top 10. Until they stop choking in the games that matter—such as their complete trouncing at the hands of Erik Ainge—and get to a BCS Title game, they belong on the list. I know they have won a lot of games over the past ten seasons. I know about 2002. But guess what, Georgia always chokes.

 

Icon Sports MediaVirginia Tech

Wait, the Hokies finished third in the polls and made a BCS game, didn’t they?

Yes, they sure did—but they also got dusted 48-7 by LSU in a "premier Top-10 matchup" early in the season.

The fact is, the Hokies start in the Top 10 pretty much every single season. Their best finish in the post-Mike Vick era?

Sixth.

Plus, they’re 3-5 in their last eight bowl games.

VA Tech gets to play in the ACC, which has been complete and utter garbage ever since Florida State and Miami have started taking it on the face. (My God those teams cause mass pukings)

And the Hokies still can’t get through their conference unscathed. Sorry, but Beamer Ball makes the list.

 

IconBoston College

Did anyone seriously think this team was a threat for the national championship when it floated weakly to No. 2 in the polls?

The Eagles have written the book on how to squander a national ranking and end up in a bowl game shown on Nickelodeon.

The last three seasons have ended with BC ranked in the final AP poll—after victories in the Continental Tire Bowl, the MPC Computers Bowl, and of course, the ultimate battle: the Meineke Car Care Bowl.

At least the Eagles made it all the way to the top this season: the Champs Sports Bowl, where they’ll face the unstoppable 7-5 Michigan State Spartans.

I’ll be on the edge of my seat for that one.

 

So, while this has been a crazy, unpredictable season, some things never change. These five schools did exactly what they always do.

Yawwwwn.

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written on December 04, 2007 Humor

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