One On One with the Truth and the Black Mamba (Humor)

Don’t even go there. Why don’t you tell me again who gave you your nickname, ‘the Black Mamba?’ Oh that’s right: You gave it to yourself because no one had one for you. Shaq called me the [expletive] Truth, even as he was winning rings with you.

Kobe: Please. I call myself the Black Mamba because 'the Mamba can strike with 99 percent accuracy at maximum speed, in rapid succession. That’s the kind of basketball precision I want to have.' (Source: ESPN)

Pierce: [Laughs] You were a long way from being 99 percent accurate in the Finals, Black Mamba. You shot, what, 40 percent against us? Oh yeah, I’ve been meaning to ask you: Tell me how my [expletive] tastes.

Kobe: I’m still the best player in the world, porky. I have three championship rings and an MVP award to prove it. It took you 10 years just to make it to the Finals, and all you have is the Finals MVP. That means you were the best player in the series, not in the world, so get your head straight.

Pierce: Yeah, and Dirk was the regular season MVP last year, and he got tossed out of the first round. I’m sure he had a long summer to think about that one. And you’d rather have the regular season MVP award than a championship ring and the Finals MVP, right? You better hope USA wins gold in Beijing, or it’s going to be a long season next year.

Note: This conversation between Paul Pierce of the Boston Celtics and Kobe Bryant of the Los Angeles Lakers did not actually take place. All content has been fabricated from the author's imagination and should not be taken as a serious report.

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