Poe McKnoe scours the Internet for blog posts, comments, and message boards that remind us you don’t need brainpower, or even common sense, to post on the Internet. No sources for material will be left out, so be careful where and what you post. Poe is reading (he finally learned how).
Internet Tough Guy
A thread on a Michigan blog that mentions ‘Jim Harbaugh’ in the title has a 99 percent chance of crashing and burning, and the Scout boards don’t disappoint. Other titles that ensure hilarity include the words “Forcier” and “Robinson,” “NCAA,” or “Domino’s Pizza.” In this thread, Michigan Scout moderators treat the posters like the minions they are.
Internal factions must be out there working to sabotage these moderators.
I’ve heard the moderators wanted to bring in there own posters, but they couldn’t pass Admissions.
What we’ve found to be the case is that the message cupboard was bare to begin, so how could anyone be successful? If only Rich Rod knew their struggles…
Offers like Napalm
Rich Rodriguez is apparently single handedly attempting to keep the United States Post Office relevant, with the newest offer count up to 165. The University of Michigan needs to start cutting costs with the auto industry in shambles and houses in Detroit going for less than Reggie Bush’s daily salary while at USC.
Where better to start than with the football team, especially since they couldn’t sell out the renovated Big House and opened up season tickets to the general public. This pretty much sums that up (NSFW).
Michigan Football Cost Reductions
- Cut out offers in school newspapers
- Interactive offers on mgoblue.com
If those solutions don’t work, Illinois and Michigan can send off the first dual-offer ever, good at either school. There’s a lot of overlap, and we’re trying to drive out costs in this rough economy.
Richie, You’re Doing A Heck of A Job
ESPN ran a segment asking what if Dick Rod ended up at Alabama, rather than Michigan. College Football Live proposed that Nick Saban would end up in Ann Arbor. I hate ‘What Ifs’ as much as the next guy, but it is an interesting question.
I can tell you that Alabama fans, while delusional about the greatness of the Tide, would not put up with the amount a fail that Rich Rod brought to Ann Arbor.
Another delusional fan base? You guessed it: Michigan!
Alabama wouldn’t sabotage Rich Rod!!
Kind of like that ‘good job’ he’s done at Michigan?
There are a lot of adjectives out there, but ‘good’ isn’t what first comes to mind. They do have a ‘win at all cost’ mentality in the SEC, which is in stark contrast to Michigan’s new found ‘lose at all cost.’
Ruining Internet message boards with the click of a button. Check.
Offer up sensational final score? Check.
Take a stab at your team’s quarterback stats? Check.
Opposing quarterback will throw x interceptions (x >2)? Check.
Call out player who chose opposing team over your team? Check.
Misspell your starting quarterback’s name while trash talking? Fail.
That’s it for this week’s Message Board Mayhem. Until the next time, I’ll keep scouring the Internet for more brashness, silliness, and stupidity. Feel free to call out any message board posts or trolls that may visit your favorite sites. Everyone has a poster or moderator they just can’t stand. I’m sure I could think of a couple from the Michigan Scout boards (ehhh hemm SonOfJorEl…ehhh hemm)