So it's a depressing time to be a Syracuse football fan. Boring, ineffective offense, poor defense, incompetent athletic director, and a back-to-back pair of bad, bland head coaches.
The future is now, and its bleak.
But the Orange weren't always so squeezed, so crushed, so pulped.
To brighten up the Orange fan's day, how about an all-time Orange Team?
Biased and arranged oddly, of course.
Quarterback: Don McPherson. Heisman runner up, leader of the undefeated '87 Orange.
Backup: Donovan McNabb. Didn't win the big ones like Donnie but a better pro. Almost beat the undefeated Miami Hurricanes in the Dome but literally threw up on the field. Shades of Super Bowl sickness?
Running backs: Heisman winner Ernie Davis and NFL Hall of Famer Jim Brown. But the Orange are very deep so Floyd Little plays in the slot and run backs punts.
The jumbo package will have NFL Hall of Famer Larry Czonka and Daryl Johnston. Or maybe Czonka can play linebacker.
Little Joe Morris returns kickoffs.
Jim Nance gets the goal line plunges. And wrestles anyone from the other squad during the post game.
The Wide Receivers: NFL Hall of Famer Art Monk, future Hall of Famer Marvin Harrison, and Rob Moore as the third wide out. We can split Little out to open up the offense if we have to.
David Tyree, the Super Bowl savior of the Giants, is the Hail Mary man.
Tight End: The great John Mackey, NFL Hall of Famer and deadly deep threat, will stretch the field.
The Offensive Line: NFL Hall of Famer and Lombardi Packer Jim Ringo at center, Pro Bowler and Ernie Davis anchor, Walter Sweeny at tackle, and long-time Philadelphia Eagle stalwart Stan Walters at the other tackle. We slide John Flannery to guard, his NFL spot, and ex-Pittsburgh Steeler Craig Wolfley at the other guard.
Gary Anderson, the one-time NFL second all-time leading scorer kicks. And kicks well.
Stop that group Penn Staters.
Defensive Line: On the defensive line let Colts star Dwight Freeney loose to pressure the passer with Paul Frase playing the run-stopping end. Baltimore Raven Super Bowl starter Rob Burnett can spell Frase on third and longs.
Tim Green can bounce along the interior causing havoc. Ted Gregory can spell him till his knee goes, again.
Linebackers: Speaking of bad knees, we have Dan Conley hobbling around at linebacker, James Collins piling up the tackles, and current Titan all-Pro Keith Bullock bringing the heat. Tweener Kevin Mitchell can play linebacker or line up as a pass rushing defensive lineman.
Defensive Backs: Donovan Darius and Markus Paul are a pair of hard-hitting safeties.
Let's put Terbucky Jones and Will Allen on the corners. Antony Smith can be the nickel man.
Patrick O'Neil will punt.
The defense isn't as formidable as the offense, but will pressure the passer and punish players catching passes across the middle.
And good enough to stop any all-time Penn State offense.
Old Ben Schwartzwalder, young again, will coach with Dick MacPherson helping with the motivation and the offense.
And let's sneak alum Al Davis onto the field to really open up the offense. Go deep.
Bring on the Nittany Kitty Cats.
Look at Czonka slice the Ham, Jack, that is.
Look at Brown carry Arrington downtown.
Look at Nance spike Millen.
Let's Go Orange!
The Orange of memory...
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