The excitement is finally over. LeBron spurned his hometown in favor of joining the Miami Mercenaries.
So what are you going to do for the next few months until these guys actually get to play some basketball (instead of talking about themselves and where they are going to sign)?
I'm sure LeBron is thinking the same thing, so here is a list of 10 ways that LeBron will improve the lifestyle in Miami (as if it needed any improving in the first place).
Welcome to Miami, LeBron.
I fully expect LeBron to recreate this scene, only involving him, South Beach, and some sand, oh about a hundred times before the season starts.
LeBron has built himself up to be larger than life in this free-agency bonanza.
There aren't many things that can make LeBron better (wait, he doesn't have a ring yet?). And there aren't many things that can top South Beach.
So why not combine the two?
In Cleveland, LeBron notoriously ran Braylon Edwards out of town (sorry Cleveland, your plan to trade him to New York to keep LeBron in town didn't quite work out the way you planned).
Now that he is in Miami, he might run into Brandon Marshall, another diva wide receiver.
Let's hope that Marshall learned his lesson and doesn't try to punch one of LeBron's friends. Otherwise, the Dolphins might ship him off to Oakland (OK, nobody is as desperate as Cleveland).
It certainly could spice things up in Miami. What better way to pass time in the off-season than making some Heat off the court?
A gathering of superstars in Miami brings one thing to mind: Will Smith's “Miami.”
The song is a little bit outdated, so it might be time for LeBron and company to make their own remix.
Who says you can't start a budding rap career in South Beach?
LeBron, Wade, and Bosh.
It is the greatest collection of talent ever assembled. The NBA is ruined forever. They will be unstoppable.
Yes, that is what they are saying, in case you haven't been paying attention (whether you believe it or not is your choice).
So, the greatest collection of talent ever assembled must have one goal atop their list: Go undefeated.
The Dolphins did it, so why not keep the tradition in Miami? If you listen to some people, this is not only possible, but it is already a foregone conclusion.
LeBron hasn't won that elusive championship yet, so he hasn't been able to say, “I'm going to Disney World!”
Sure, this isn't in Miami, but it is just up the road.
The King has to go to the Magic Kingdom at least once, right?
What better way for LeBron to celebrate his arrival in Miami than to buy an island off the coast?
It would certainly fit the theme of self-promotion.
He could turn it into his own little playground, perhaps naming it “King LeBron Island,” or something much more creative than that.
Just think of the parties and craziness that would happen if he did this. South Beach and LeBron Island?
Yeah, I think Miami is just a little better off in the morning.
If LeBron attends a Marlins game, it may be the single greatest moment in their history. It may even be better than either of the team's World Series championships.
Well, it would at least sell more than five tickets, wouldn't it?
The Marlins may never be the same. Hanley Ramirez might not chase after a ball because there are so many people in the stands. Oh, he does that anyway?
The Witnesses wouldn't even care if he wore his Yankees cap.
LeBron is so great that he can part the sea. He can walk on water.
Well, he is at least powerful enough to clean up BP's mess.
Sorry, LeBron. That's what happens when you create so much hype around yourself.
Now, get to work. South Beach is waiting.
(I mean, no offense to anyone by creating this slide, if anyone is touchy on the subject. It is all in light-hearted fun.)
Oh, yeah. I almost forgot with all of the hype he has brought to himself, but LeBron is, in fact, a basketball player.
So, one way that he could improve Miami is on the basketball court. What a novel concept. I should have thought of it myself.
Flash no longer has the Big Diesel, but he now has a King to help him win another ring.
Basketball fever will be at an all-time high with LeBron and company in town.
Miami may never be the same. In fact...
With Bosh, Wade, and James in tow, Miami may be the new mecca of basketball.
L.A. has its history. So does Boston. New York is considered the mecca of basketball, but it is a new age.
All the casual fans will become Miami fans because that's the way the NBA works.
If these guys can turn all of this hype into success, then Miami may be the new place to be for basketball fans.
Jordan turned Chicago into an NBA haven, and now it's Miami's turn.
Welcome to Miami, the new basketball capital of the world.