Welcome to the technology age, King James.
It's surprising that a guy so young and so plugged into pop culture has somehow managed to avoid Twitter for this long.
Well, no worries. LeBron James is going to make up for lost time starting Thursday night.
From the minute he makes his much ballyhooed announcement on ESPN, he's going to be a Tweeting fool.
Luckily, we got an advance look at some of the Tweets the James camp is preparing to send out depending on where The King decides to make his kingdom.
"Bite me @terezowens. My mama would never hang with a creepy dude like @TheReal_Delonte. That said, I just made him a UFA. $4.6 mil for a real PG."
"I got 99 problems and the Nets ain't one. Just bustin @TheOfficialJayZ, U know u my boy. Prokhorov's mafia, man. Get out while u can."
"@chrisbosh, welcome back to USA, freak. @dwadeofficial, does this mean I'm out of your Fave Five? We just signed Earl Boykins. C u in the finals."
"Sorry CLE. NYK has Amar'e and the Yanks. Dolan offered me a lifetime role in Cats. A man's gotta sing when a man's gotta sing. Memories ..."
"Ur losers CLE. Even The King couldn't end the stench. The Q's a dump. Antawn Jamison? Is that really the best u could do? Peace out."
"Hangin w @mikesituation in Wildwood. Jay-Z and me are joining "Jersey Shore" for season 3. Snooki and Wes are making out on the Ferris wheel."
"Prokhorov made mama Nets CEO. Miss u already, CLE. Newark's a hellhole. Proceeds from special go to Cavs to resign Ilgauskas. Ur welcome."
"@ItsKobeBryant, it's on. You got Odom, I got Bosh and Wade. I like my odds. No more puppets, Nike Boy. This is where amazin' happens."
"Boozer, Rose. Winning tradition. Pizzeria Uno. Blame @TheReal_Delonte. He made my mama a cougar. CLE, free tix to NBA Finals in CHI on me!"
"Psych! Geffen offered me black "Entourage". Sterling was offed by Prokhorov during pitch mtgs. Akron Hammer's going Hollywood! Holla!"