The 2010 NCAA football season will be here before we know it—and not soon enough for most pigskin worshipers.
Conference realignment seemed to satisfy the pangs left by the 2009 season's close, but now the makeup of college football seems to be calm and cohesive—at least for now.
So to what are we as college football fanatics supposed to cling?
Predictions and speculations satisfy our desires for only a short time. We grow tired from the constant analysis, feel sick in our circular arguments.
But there's always a guilty pleasure on which to rely: hot lists.
We're all familiar with the hottest cities of the World Cup, the College World Series, and the NHL.
So, to give desperate college football fans another thing to stimulate their vulnerable, sports-loving minds, here is a list of college sports' hottest cities.
Highest recorded temperature: 111 degrees Fahrenheit—September, 1963.
San Diego is famous for having phenomenal weather year-round, but on occasion the city is too hot to handle.
Often the climatic victim of wildfires, San Diego named its short-lived ABA team the San Diego Wildfire.
Still, the hot weather in San Diego has not kept San Diego State University from developing a rich college sports history.
A member of the Mountain West Conference, SDSU was home to John Madden, Marshall Faulk, and Stephen Strasburg.
Also, there are probably a few hot girls at San Diego State. Probably.
Highest recorded temperature: 112 degrees Fahrenheit—September 5, 2000.
Austin, Texas, home of the University of Texas Longhorns, is an extremely warm city, but the high average temperatures do little to keep Texas from winning football games every year.
The Longhorns are the second-winningest team in NCAA football history after the University of Michigan Wolverines.
Oh, and I guess girls take their clothes off in Austin sometimes.
Highest recorded temperature: 112 degrees Fahrenheit—July 22, 2006.
Like San Diego, Los Angeles is known for wonderful weather, but it too can be overwhelmingly hot at times.
The hot weather, however, has not kept the Bruins from winning a handful of basketball championships—they've won 11.
Some of the world's best athletes have come from UCLA, including Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Jackie Robinson, and Jackie Joyner-Kersee.
Girls are cool. Some of them live in Los Angeles.
Highest recorded temperature: 112 degrees Fahrenheit—1980.
Forth Worth is a hot city. It is also home to one of NCAA hottest football programs in Texas Christian University.
Members of the Mountain West Conference, the TCU Horned Frogs have established themselves as BCS-caliber athletes. Last year, TCU battled Boise State in the 2009 Tostitos Fiesta Bowl.
Girls, football, and beer. It's all I've ever wanted.
Highest recorded temperature: 114 degrees Fahrenheit—1994.
El Paso, Spanish for "the step," is notorious for its perennial scorchers.
The heat, however, is no match for the University of Texas-El Paso Miners. UTEP is tied for 10th in Division I Men's sports championships.
In 1966, the Miners won the NCAA Basketball Championship.
Under their clothes, girls are always naked. Even the hot ones.
Highest recorded temperature: 114 degrees Fahrenheit—1925.
Another California city, another scorcher. But Sacramento is home to...umm...the Sacramento State Hornets! The Hornets have won...something...probably...at some point. They play Division I football!
Girls wear bikinis in Sacramento. Take that, University of North Dakota!
Highest recorded temperature: 115 degrees Fahrenheit—1905.
Fresno, California, home of the Fresno State Bulldogs, is an historically warm city, but climate never kept the dogs down.
In 2008, the Bulldogs won the College World Series, becoming the lowest-ranked team to ever win the NCAA Baseball Championship.
Highest recorded temperature: 118 degrees Fahrenheit—1931.
Vegas, baby. Vegas. Sin City is one of the hottest cities for a lot of reasons.
Las Vegas is home to the University of Nevada-Las Vegas Rebels, who are third on the all-time winning percentage list in men's basketball behind Kentucky and North Carolina.
UNLV has been to the Final Four four times, and won the National Championship in 1990.
Highest recorded temperature: 117 degrees Fahrenheit—1990.
Tucson has oft been the backdrop to Western movies, including "The Outlaw Josie Wales," and more recently "3:10 to Yuma."
Furthermore, the city is home to one of the most decorated Division I schools: The University of Arizona.
The University of Arizona is a basketball powerhouse. Under coach Lute Olson, the Wildcats went to 25 consecutive NCAA Tournaments, and made it to the Final Four four times.
In 1997, the Wildcats won the National Championship, beating three No. 1 seeds on the way in Kansas, North Carolina, and Kentucky.
Girls Gone Wild...cats. *Cough*
Highest recorded temperature: 122 degrees Fahrenheit—June 26, 1990.
Phoenix, Arizona is hotter than Hell. Maybe that's why students at Arizona State University call themselves the Sun Devils.
Like the University of Arizona Wildcats, the Arizona State Sun Devils have a rich sports history.
Members of the Pac-10 Conference, the Sun Devils have been to 12 NCAA men's basketball tournaments, and have won numerous football Bowl Games, including the Rose Bowl in 1987.
Playboy ranked ASU No. 6 on its 2010 list of top party schools. So...yeah.
If you're reading this slide, you've shown true commitment to useless knowledge. That, or you really thought you'd get to see the hottest girls in college sports.
Well, folks, I'm sorry.
But at least you know a little bit more about the makeup of sports in some of the United States' truly hottest cities.
Here's to not selling out!