Michael Jordan Hitler Mustache: The Most Ridiculous Sports Facial Hair
Most professional employees must dress up everyday for work, shave, and look their overall best all the time. Athletes, on the other hand, have the freedom to look anyway they want, while still making millions of dollars.
Some athletes take advantage of this freedom and choose to make themselves look ridiculous.
The athletes with the Funniest Looking Facial Hair in Sports may think they look good, but they simply look ridiculous.
Jason Giambi transformed himself from a dangerous looking slugger that bats in the heart of the Yankee lineup to an emotional soccer dad that is mistakenly at the heart of the order, rather than on the bench.
The only good thing that came from Giambi's mustache is the hot streak that came with it. Who would have expected that?
Sidney Crosby looks extremely frustrated in this picture. That is because he cannot find a way to grow a real playoff beard.
Crosby, 22 at the time, attempted to look as manly as his teammates during the playoffs. But in the end he looked like a 15-year-old kid that lost his razor.
Walt Frazier's chops stood out in his time in the NBA. That is probably because he had at least 80 percent of a full beard. The thing is, he is missing the important part.
Frazier is missing the connecting part of the beard. The equivalent would if The Golden Gate Bridge stopped a hundred feet away from either side of land. It just is not normal.
Joe Namath's facial hair has no title or label. It is more than a mustache, less than a mustache with handle bars, while not quite a full goatee.
But whatever the correct title to this facial hair design is, it looks unusual.
You may not recognize Alexi Lalas, but he is the analyst of the World Cup on ESPN. A former American soccer player, he decided to grow his goatee about five times longer than what is considered acceptable.
The combination of the extremely long hair on his head and the equally as long goatee on his face, Lalas looks very much like a dog. Thankfully he looks nothing like this picture today, or else he would not be seen on television.
This goatee would probably not be considered so unusual if it were not pink. But that fact that it is pink leads everyone to wonder: why is his goatee pink?
Not only does it stand out, but it also does not match his skin.
Scott Spiezio's soul strip looks like someone took a fake mustache, turned it vertically, and stuck it on his face. This would look good if he had some other type of facial hair around it; but he does not.
Therefore it looks like something is missing on his face or his soul strip does not belong. Take your pick.
It is hard to imagine how long it took Lanny McDonald to grow this massive mustache. This mustache is so unusual due to how it grows out past McDonald's lip.
This is hands down the classiest facial hairdo in sports. Fingers looks like an extremely wealthy European man.
While this does not help him look any less ridiculous, at least it makes his decision look slightly thoughtful.
Scott Pollard's decision to grow this, on the other hand, is completely pointless. This unusual goatee looks somewhat like a skateboard, or maybe even a table.
Whatever it is, obviously, it does not look good. Pollard's "goatee" makes it seem like there could never be a more ridiculous looking goatee...
Then came Drew Gooden to prove everyone wrong. This is hands down the most ridiculous looking goatee I have ever seen.
Maybe Drew Gooden was trying to make some sort of statement by growing this goatee.
But the only statement I can possibly think of that THIS goatee would make is: "save the octopus, do not pollute the oceans."