Flyers vs. Blackhawks: Who Has The Hotter Ice Girls?
With the Flyers coming back from being down 0-2 to knot the series at two games apiece, the Stanley Cup is seemingly up for grabs. How do you pick a winner? The team with the momentum (Flyers) or the team with two more games at home (Blackhawks)?
Personally, I like to go a less traditional route: by picking the team with the hottest cheerleaders. Luckily for me, the Flyers and the Blackhawks both have employed Ice Girls, so that will more than do the trick.
Let's check out the tale of the tape.
Team Photo: Flyers Girls
This is a pretty good looking bunch. Not an uggo in the bunch, really. Philly has always been a pretty good city for attractive women.
They are on ice, so there's a good amount of covering going on, but they do give us some bare midriffs, so there's that.
Team Photo: Blackhawks Girls
Whoa, the Blackhawks come out strong. Super bare midriffs, mini-skirts, and some of the girls are even kneeling on the ice. For badassery, the Blackhawks girls are the clear winners.
Shovel Skills: Flyers Girls
Look at that little girl with that shovel. It's bigger than she is. What she lacks in height, though, she makes up for in form. And I'm not talking about the shoveling any more.
Shovel Skills: Blackhawks Girls
Now these are some shoveling skills. This Blackhawks girl has a full shovel load and manages to do this all without wearing pants. That's quite a skill.
Who's the winner here? Why don't you ask the guy behind the glass that needs to pick up his jaw?
Giveaways: Flyers Girls
Here are the Flyers Girls outside of the arena handing out signs and what look to be towels.
Think it's a coincidence that we see nothing but men standing around them? I think not.
Giveaways: Blackhawks Girls
Still, nothing quite beats free t-shirts. And nobody is as excited about them as the pretty lady giving them away.
I'm just happy she's not keeping any for herself. I think the outfit she's working is doing just fine.
Random Group Shot: Flyers Girls
Here's the thing about girls. When they take pictures, it's always a big deal. You can go for the crazy, random picture where they act all crazy, or they can line up and do the "look how hot we are all together in a row" picture.
Looks like the Flyers Girls went the latter route. I have to say, they do look pretty hot all together in a row.
Random Group Shot: Blackhawks Girls
Man, the Blackhawks girls are not giving anything away. They went for the "laying down, but really just an excuse to showcase our cleavage" pose. Classic!
They are just impervious to the cold. Must come from living in Chicago or something.
Use of Equipment: Flyers Girls
The Ice Girls are all about shovels, so I'm surprised the Flyers would designate some of their girls for squeegee duty. Especially an odd couple like Danny DeVito and Arnold Schwarzenegger over here.
Okay, that's not fair. The little one is way hotter than Danny DeVito.
Use of Equipment: Blackhawks Girls
Wow, she is good with that shovel.
Even with all of the points I have to deduct for her spray tan, the Blackhawks are just hotter in every single way.
I'm not even paying attention to the shovel. Just look at her.
Cleavage: Flyers Girls
Okay, the Flyers are determined not to get shut out here. In our final and most important category, they are doing as much as they can.
Their uniforms don't really allow for much, but this one is zipped down for optimal seduction. But is it enough to save face?
Cleavage: Blackhawks Girls
Yeah... I didn't think so. The Blackhawks are the clear winners here. There's so much cleavage going on here that Gary Bettman had to declare this game PG-13.
Not that I'm complaining. I'm older than 13 after all.
Winner: The Blackhawks Girls
When it comes down to it, there was really no contest. The Blackhawks girls are one of the hottest "cheerleading" squads in all of sports and their outfits are enough to melt the ice.
Add to the fact that I'm pretty sure the Flyers girls got discontinued this year... and that's just another strike against Philly.
In a 6-0 landslide, it's the Blackhawks all the way. Sorry Philadelphia, you always have the Phillies.