There is nothing a pretty girl loves more than attention.

It’s an obsession. An addiction.

Theoretically, they shouldn’t need attention—the average pretty girl gets more attention than a crying baby—but that doesn’t stop them from seeking it out.

The thrill of being pursued by one more unsuspecting fellow with no chance feeds their insecurities. They’ll playfully string along countless hopeless guys until single life is no longer practical.

On July 1, the prettiest girl in the NBA becomes single again.

LeBron James, arguably the NBA’s best player, will be chased by every NBA GM in need of a prom date.

James will let them pursue him because it will feed his insecurity. He will then playfully string along each hopeless GM before dropping the inevitable bombshell.

He is not going anywhere.

Right now, the alternatives sound great. “Come to New York and you’ll be the world’s biggest sporting star! Come to Chicago and continue Jordan’s legacy! Align with Dwyane Wade somewhere and create an indestructible tandem!”

But each of these scenarios enters into play a variable that James is clearly uncomfortable with: Pressure.

Any team that signs James is anointing him the "franchise savior."   Hired guns get no leeway. It’s officially championship or naught for the “King."  

Can LeBron James, the only superstar of memory to get ousted before the NBA Finals while having the league’s best record two seasons in a row, flourish under these predicaments? Possibly, but when the alternative is so much easier, why even bother?

By staying in Cleveland, James can continue a career of zero accountability—a career that he has proven well-suited for. Cavs fans will remain forever indebted to him for staying, and LeBron will be showered with the unwavering support that every insecure pretty girl has to have.

And most importantly, the cycle that has been LeBron’s career can remain unchanged: Cavs win most regular season games = Praise LeBron. Cavs lose in playoffs = Blame LeBron’s teammates. It’s a win-win.

Would a career path of this nature fly in New York? Hell no.

The Big Apple is a completely different animal than Cleveland. Yes, Knicks fans want LeBron to sign with them—in part because he’s an incredible basketball player and in part to justify the misery of the last decade—but the honeymoon ends immediately after the start of the season.

If the Knicks start off 6-4, LeBron will be chastised for starting slow. If the Knicks fall in the Conference Finals, it will be pinned on James, not his teammates.

Not every player is comfortable with the accountability required of a superstar. Some, like Kobe Bryant, need only a basketball to make stories during NBA Finals week. Some, like LeBron James, need only Larry King. It’s clear where each player’s priorities lie.

So stock up on those season ticket packages, Knicks fans. You won’t want to miss out on seeing The LeBron James Show in person next season.

That is, when Cleveland comes to town, of course.