Look at that. Sir Arthur Rhodes is either making the "V" sign (for "victory"), or trying to hump his back upward for the "W" (which would signify "win"). He is begging Reds General Manager Walt Jocketty for another arm to come out of the pen.
If the Cincinnati Reds plan a September run, they will need to trade for a relief pitcher.
Preferably an inexpensive one, who can keep the ball in the yard and will not cost the entire farm system.
The Reds' minor league system is stacked with palatable talent.
This project concentrates on four rebuilding teams—clubs looking to trade big league players for young bucks.
Altogether there will be one pitcher from each of four teams: the Arizona Diamondbacks, Baltimore Orioles, Cleveland Indians, and the Kansas City Royals.
Let's have a look-see.
Maybe Nick Masset should stop working on his pose, and start trying to pitch effectively.
Other than Sir Arthur—that goes for the entire corps.
Check out these numbers:
4.78 ERA, 1.5 WHIP, and a 0.96 HR/9
Without Arthur Rhodes:
5.53 ERA, 1.65 WHIP, and 1.06 homers per nine.
Considering the Reds play in one of the most home run-friendly ballparks in baseball, their HR/9 is very respectable.
The league average is 1.03...or somewhere around there.
But the runners allowed and ERA just plain stinks.
So, who can help improve those numbers?
Aaron Heilman, former first-round draft pick and No. 1 prospect (2003) in the Mets' organization, is one tough cookie to figure out.
His first three years out of the pen were top-notch. He had an ERA of 3.26, a 1.12 WHIP, and a mere 0.6 HR/9.
Then 2008 and 2009 hit. His final year with the Mets was horrible, and his 2009 campaign with the Cubbies wasn't much better.
All of his numbers inflated dramatically. Specifically, the stellar 0.6 HR/9 jumped to 1.15, nearly doubling.
With Arizona though, he has regained his olden-days numbers of 2005-2007.
With 30 percent of the regular season down the tubes, Heilman is sitting on a 3.26 ERA, 1.08 WHIP, and 0.91 HR per nine.
He's a bargain guy at $2.15 million. But he's also a fly ball pitcher, which, in and of itself, is not a bad thing—as long as the flies don't leave the ball yard.
Arizona's Chase Field is a hitter-friendly park. But nothing compared to Cincinnati's Great American Small Park.
That 0.91 HR/9 would elevate to Heilman's '08 and '09 numbers.
The most the Reds should give: A lower-level prospect and Logan Ondrusek.
It's hard not to feel bad for O's fans. They needed to be included because, well, they're looking like one of the worst teams in the MLB.
Yes, they are in what is arguably the toughest division in baseball. Exactly how many more years is Peter Angelos same worn out tune?
Oh, and of May 27, the Washington Nationals had more than double the number of reads from their "Top Writers" here on the ole Bleacher Report.
Ohman is having a fine start, but there is very little in his eight-year MLB career that would indicate that the trend will continue.
The Reds already have a below-average left-handed specialist in Daniel Ray Cabrera. The only thing that might make Ohman a better option is experience.
The most the Reds should give: That 37-year-old whose wife keeps nagging him to retire from Single-A ball.
Chris Perez is automatically disqualified due to that distracting mullet.
Dude, this isn't 1988.
Besides that he has nine walks in 16 innings.
The Reds already have one Nick Masset, and he does not expose himself to the world while wearing that dreadful hairdo.
Sorry Tribe. The Reds would request payment to take Perez.
Or wait, do the Reds still have that Justin Lehr guy?
Kyle Farnsworth, the 34-year-old tough guy veteran, would be a perfect addition to the Reds' bullpen.
He's a bit pricey at $4.5 million this season with a club option in 2011, but if Jocketty is serious about taking this season, he should talk to the Kansas City brass concerning Farnsworth.
He mixes fastballs and sliders about 50/50 with about a 10 mph differential on the radar gun. His heater still tops out at about 93 or 94, and opposing batters are scared pantsless.
Not at all afraid to take it to the kitchen, he's already plunked three batters this season.
Coming from the pitcher-friendly Kauffman Stadium, he will give up a few moon-deckers. But he'll be dang sure to give the next guy some helmet high heat.
Talk about two intimidating set-up men, Rhodes and Farnsworth would rock it like a hurricane.
So what? Okay, he really doesn't have the best statistical track record.
He's had a couple of really good years in the past, and he's almost one-third of the way through another one now.
Farnsworth is the perfect fit for the Reds' pen.
The most the Reds should give:
The fact that the Reds would be taking on a fairly decent-sized contract, they shouldn't give up too much else.
Kansas City would probably want an arm. Is Matt Maloney ever going to do anything?
Come on Walt, the Reds need ya, bro.
For this Reds fan, Kyle Farnsworth is almost a too-good-to-be-true compliment to the southpaw table-setter Rhodes.
The same Reds fan understands that things don't always work out. That said, Arizona's Aaron Heilman would also be a monster improvement to the pen.
Chris Perez, no. How the Ohio brethren to the north put up with that hair is a question no one can properly answer.
And Will Ohman—sorry. That Reds fan just wanted to take some jabs at Peter "Call Me If Your Loved One Died of Asbestos Poisoning" Angelos, possibly the biggest sleazebag owner—tough one there.
So come on Walt! Bring Kyle Farnsworth or Aaron Heilman to the Reds.