So after writing two previous articles on the worst gimmicks in both the WWE and WCW, I said to myself, "why not go with twice the douchebaggery and attempt to rate the tag teams?"
So, here it is, a list that all but sums up the worst there was in tag team gimmicks. But, please remember that these are tag team gimmicks, not crappy tag teams. If that was not the case I could have any of the Miz's teams on here.
So sit back with some rhythm and blues, try to stay away from the hog slop, and don't be afraid to show how gay you really are, as I give you the worst tag team gimmicks between both WWE and WCW.
To start the countdown I wanted to go with more of an oddity, and no, not the ones who were freaks back in the WWF in the late 90's. This was an odd pairing to say the least.
Owen Hart, a member of the storied Hart family, and Koko B. Ware, a guy who acts like he is flying to the ring with his parrot Frankie.
They were called High Energy, maybe because the colors bouncing off their outfits could light downtown L.A.
While they were only around for a short time, they did manage to feud with some great tag teams in the Nasty Boys and Money Inc.
They made only one pay-per-view appearance and lost to the Headshrinkers (who?) at the 1992 Survivor Series. Hart injured his knee in '92, and Koko went on to beat jobbers for a few years, but the team never got back together.
Nevertheless, High Energy will go down as maybe the most baggy, colorful, suspender-ish tag team in history, just because of their pants.
High Energy kicks us off at No. 10, while their pants earn an honorable mention.
Next up is Power and Glory. They sucked, and I should end typing now. But, let me go over the history of this gag gimmick.
The two had teamed up after Paul Roma had lost a match to Dino Bravo (another gimmick turd) after Jimmy Hart had hit him with the megaphone (megaphone may make the list of crappy weapon gimmicks).
Roma stayed in the ring dazed until the Rockers hit the ring for their match, and that's when all hell broke loose.
Roma became enraged that they had come out for their match, and next thing you know the guy with chains named Hercules was there, and it was big man muscle love at first sight.
They feuded with the Rockers for a while, fought for the titles against the Hart Foundation a few times, and ultimately beat a lot of jobber tag teams on Superstar and All American Wrestling. They also lost to the Legion of Doom at Wrestlemania 7 in less than a minute.
Realizing that no one cared, they were broken up. Hercules stayed and continued to beat up jobbers, while Roma went to WCW to become a Four Horseman. What? Yep, that shows how bad it was at the time there.
Power and Glory, a glorious triumph as the ninth worst gimmick tag team.
It doesn't get much worse than Lenny Lane and Lodi tagging. It gets even worse when they rip off a past gimmick that sucked between Stunning Steve Austin and Brian Pillman, the Hollywood Blondes. But, again, this was the WCW towards the end.
Both had been mid carders at best, mostly jobbing to up and comers. So what do they do? Well, they make them come across as gay for each other (like the gimmick wasn't already gay as it is) and put them in pink tights with large pink triangles. Later to tone it down for the network they were revealed to be brothers.
They weren't around long, as the Gay community threatened to boycott WCW, like anyone was still watching at this point anyway?
They formed several other tag teams including Standards and Practices, a rip off of WWF's Right to Censor. This gimmick was just as lame, except for the appearances of Stacy Kiebler. By mid 2000 both Lane and Lodi were released.
It doesn't get much gayer than the West Hollywood Blondes at No. 8, or does it?
Mike Enos and Wayne Bloom were on the fast track to wrestling stardom back in the early 90's. That was until they went to the WWF and received a shitty gimmick.
They were spoiled rich Beverly Hills brats, probably in order to steal that 90210 crowd, even though I am sure 13-year-old girls could care less about wrestling.
Beau and Blake Beverly worked their way through jobber tag teams in the beginning along with their manager Coach, but something was missing.
I know, the Genius! Let's make him their manager! Let's make this worse than it already is!
The Brothers feuded with all the major tag teams of the time, never winning. A little over a year into their WWF careers they were dropped to jobber status and appeared only on syndicated programming. Bloom semi retired, and Enos went on to WCW to suck some more.
Rich and gimmicky, the Beverly Brothers rank at No. 7.
Can it get any gayer? Yep. Billy and Chuck made no apologies for their gay antics in the ring. I can still hear the song in my head "You are sooooo, good to me." Does that make me gay?
After the watered down Invasion angle, Palumbo started teaming with Gunn and they had backstage vignettes where they gave each other headbands and started dressing alike.
They also acted totally gay for each other both in and out of the ring, and who could forget Rico, their personal stylist?
They won the tag titles on two separate occasions, and even had a marriage proposal and wedding.
At the wedding, they revealed it was just a stunt, and then a whole bunch of terrible gimmicky stuff happened, including 3 minute warning coming out. Lame.
After the gay angle was over they remained a tag team until Gunn got hurt. You can't have a tag team without the Ass man.
Either way, the two had divorced, and Billy and Chuck had gone down in history as the gayest tag team in WWE history, literally.
Gay and proud of it at No. 6, Billy and Chuck are good to you.
Mabel and Mo made up Men on a Mission, oh and I almost forgot about Oscar, not a grouch, but their manager.
They were packaged as the positive, rapping tag team that wanted to inspire, but they really came across as lame.
Several vignettes of them appeared on WWF programming showing them in the ghetto preaching the good word.
From my experiences in the ghetto, and I'm not saying that wrestling is fake, they would have been shot less than a minute after they opened their mouths.
Fun fact: They actually won the title once when Mabel fell on one of the Quebecers accidentally during a match. They lost it back to them two days later.
The two had several breaks while Mabel focused on his solo career. Their partnership came to en end when Mabel won the 1995 King of the Ring. Now that is when you know wrestling has gotten bad.
As the shirt on Mabel says, Whoomp there it is, your No. 5 crappy gimmick.
For No. 4, we go back to the "what haven't we done" file.
"What do you want?"
"I got this great idea about a group of workout freaks."
"Damnit! Do it, or your fired!"
At least that's how I think it went. Either way Chris Candido and Tammy Sytch, who were real life lovers, were introduced together as fitness freaks. Now what's better than having two Body Donnas? Three, silly boy!
That's where we bring in Tom Prichard, or Zip as he was known in WWF. These guys did jumping jacks in the ring and wrestled their little hearts out, but no one cared because who likes fitness freaks, other than Simon Dean?
Nevertheless, they won the title at Wrestlemania 12. Why you ask? Just look at Sunny. That is the only reason to care about them. But, all good things come to an end as Sunny decided she wanted inbreed with both the Godwins and Smoking Gunns.
The Donnas replaced Sunny with Kloudi, who was a man dressed as a woman, and no it wasn't Chyna. A few months later Skip got hurt and the Body Donnas were put on ice.
Jumpin Jacking their way to the four spot, the Body Donnas and their smoking hot manager.
Speaking of Sunny, I still can't believe she managed these guys! I mean, I know this is before Dennis Knight became Naked Mideon, but they still sucked nevertheless.
Henry Godwinn had been floundering the WWF ever since they had signed him. How do you make anyone care about him, give him a cousin, Phineas, and a manager, Hilbilly Jim, and make them a tag team.
They made it, and lost in the Wrestlemania 12 tag team finals to the Body Donnas. Phineas became obsessed with Sunny. They won the title, hired Sunny, then lost the title, lost Sunny, and then got hurt. I put this so quickly because no one really cares.
Most people remember the hog slop matches, yet another gimmick that sucked. If you go back into the vault of shit from back then, I think you can find a hog slop match with Sir Hunter Hearst Helmsley in there.
Oink oink at No. 3, slopping up the WWF in the mid 90's, the Godwinns.
I have never been inside a gay strip joint personally, but if I had, I bet most of them look like the two clowns above, Marcus Bagwell and Scott Riggs.
They were said to be two men, proud of their bodies and were ladies men, if the ladies liked 'em kinda gay and gimmicky.
They would walk to the ring in their short shorts and suspenders, later it was tights, and sing their own entrance theme as they came in. They were pretty solid in the ring together, but many couldn't get over their horrible gimmick.
They had a one week run with the belts after an impromptu win over Harlem Heat on Nitro. They would end up losing the belts back less than a week later to Harlem Heat and down the card they went in favor of the many NWO factions.
The two would disband after Buff Daddy joined the NWO and would feud for a while. WCW then realized that Riggs sucked on his own and feuded on the mid card until hurting his neck.
Buff went on to become the Stuff and is now somewhere in Georgia popping pain killers all day.
They were definitely American, they may have been males, but they definitely were a bad gimmick and chart the runner up position.
It simply didn't get any worse than this during the Bill Watts era of WCW. Simply put, take two jobbers, dress them in body suits with bells on them.
When one Ding Dong was in the ring, the other would ring an annoying bell in the corner.
After being unveiled at one of the Clash's (thank God it wasn't pay-per-view) they were shortly dismantled by the Skyscrapers and unmasked to be..... drum roll.... Jobbers! No shit?
Bottom line, this was about as stupid as having the Yeti and Giant Gonzalez tag as a mummy and Frankenstein, which I am surprised they didn't try.
Ding Dong the list is done with a pair of masked jobbers taking the top spot.
While this is my list of some of the worst, a top ten really cannot do the world of crappy tag team gimmicks justice. There was just too many retard sandwiches eaten between Vince and the morons at WCW.
As I have done in past charts, I will attempt to honor the others in a few short sentences. Starting off with Money Inc., the Bashams, Rhythm and Blues, Too Cool, T & A, Kronik, 3 Minute Warning, The Quebecers, and I will leave it with the Headbangers
But I am sure there are others, so again, I always want to hear what you have to add, so please feel free to add them in the comment bar below, and remember as bad as it may be now, it could always be worse.