Queen Latifah and Common's new movie Just Wright hits theaters Friday about an NBA player who falls for a physical therapist.
They are trying to make us think it's a sports movie with the poster of him in a jersey and previews of him playing basketball, but we know it's going to be another crappy love story posing as a sports movie.
Bad sports movies usually fall under one of three categories: horrible sequels, love stories masquerading as a sports movie, and mind-numbing predictability and corniness.
You just know that Just Wright is going to end up on this list someday: The 25 Worst Sports Movies Of The Last 25 Years.
Nope, not a good movie, stop your protesting.
Just because a movie has good actors and a non-preposterous plot doesn’t mean it’s automatically good.
The whole movie was just a downer, Damon did nothing but whine, Charlize Theroon was a wet blanket, and Will Smith phoned it in with a “I’m not perpetuating a stereotype, am I?” look on his face the whole time.
This movie catches Danny Glover right in the “where the hell did my career go?” stage. Shortly before Operation Dumbo Drop and Gone Fishin’, he’s got that look on his face the whole time like, “when is Lethal Weapon 4 coming down the pipe?”
I know it’s a family classic, but watching people flap their arms around for half the movie gets old quick. At least Matthew McConaughey got to take his shirt off in it.
You want to know why you don't get no respect, Rodney? It's because you made movies like this.
I can't stand movies where guys dress up as girls and then play a sport. That's totally unbelievable. That is, until Serena Williams shocks the world.
Too much love, not enough basketball. We also don’t buy the fact that she could actually give him competition in a game. Not happening. I’d buy Air Bud’s plot line before I bought that.
You would think that a movie about football back when it was guys playing in basically no protection and just kicking each other’s asses for the whole game would be manly. Leatherheads turned out to be the complete opposite of that.
It was shocking that it ended up being predictable and pretentious until you remember that Rick Reilly wrote the book it was based on. Then it all makes sense.
I’m a firm believer that any movie with an animal doing human things is just Hollywood’s way of saying, “we give up.” That goes double when the animal plays sports.
Even worse than this movie was the fact that it spun off a number of sequels and incredibly bad puns. Air Bud: Golden Receiver, Air Bud: World Pup, etc. Spare me.
Starring Emilio Estevez!
… for about 10 minutes.
That sort of deception is enough to drop D3 (a movie I was super excited for, by the way) into this list.
We were desperate for an actual good movie about tennis. Too bad we were given a lame chick flick.
Also, Kirsten Dunst turned in one of the worst athletic performances since Tim Robbins tried to throw a baseball.
If you couldn’t tell already, I’m not a huge fan of the ghosts coming back and helping a sports team in movies.
It’s the whole “hey, the ball looked like it was going in and an unseen force seemed to slap it away, but we’ll act like nothing out of the ordinary just happened” thing that gets me.
My college roommate defends this movie to the death, but the fact is–no pun intended–the movie crashes and burns in every single way. Okay, pun intended just a little bit.
Sly Stallone seems determined to be an action star again and he actually turns out to be the best actor in the film. That’s not a compliment to Mr. Stallone, the rest of the cast was just that bad.
Indy car racing just isn’t as sexy as it would like to believe.
Another movie where they tricked us into thinking it was going to be about baseball. We’re a sucker for those.
This turned out to be a crappy love story with Freddy Prince Jr. and Jessica Beil with Matthew Lillard mugging for the camera the whole time trying to make us remember he was in Scream.
No, thank you.
We've got a main character named Cru who falls in love with Lori Laughlin on his way to becoming a BMX champion.
It's a quintessential 80s movie...and that's not a good thing. Just the name alone lands this movie on the list.
Seriously, Will Ferrell, stop trying to make sports movies. Theoretically, you and a kids sports movie should be gold, I know, but it just ended up being a loud, stupid mess.
You even had to bring Ditka down with you. Is there no end to your destruction? I’m leaving Talledega Nights off this list to be nice. Don’t push your luck with another one.
Between NBA players having a “do I really have to pretend that Lil’ Bow Wow is schooling me?” face on the whole movie, we have to put up ridiculous effects of Bow Wow dunking and Jonathan Lipnicki desperately trying to get in as many movies as humanly possible while he was still cute.
Seriously, though, Bow Wow dunks from the three point line. Wasn’t he supposed to get his powers from Jordan’s shoes? When did Jordan ever do that?
What do you do when Ralph Macchio is too old to be in these movies, you’ve still got a few years left of Pat Morita, and you’re 15 years away from being able to do a remake with Will Smith’s kid? Do another Karate Kid, but with a girl this time!
Hilary Swank did all she could, but when half the fun of the Karate Kid movies was Mr. Miyagi’s inappropriate relationship with Daniel San, we just couldn’t quite get into the new one.
Do you ever get insulted at the plots of sports movies? I do. Especially when they don’t even try to change things up.
Oh, look, the cocky, Barry Bonds-esque baseball player is going back to try and get his milestone. I bet he comes out of the experience with a better appreciation for the game and becomes a better person for it.
Mitchell became the most popular guy on earth... once he took to the sky!
A tagline that lame could only come from a movie even lamer.
Has there ever been a good movie about rollerblading? Yeah... I didn't think so.
Hahahaha. Look, it’s two guys skating together. Isn’t that hilarious? Hahaha, another gay joke. What a funny movie!
Sorry, Chris Kline doesn’t get to be a badass. Ever. There’s no recovering from that casting.
Also known as Black Caddyshack, Who’s Your Caddy? was a disaster from the start.
When you have to resort to fart jokes, unless it’s Blazing Saddles, you know that you've lost all hope of a good movie.
Major League was one of the best sports movies ever. Major League II was a disappointment, but it had its moments. Major League: Back To The Minors just shouldn’t have been made at all.
Look, we get why baseball makes for good movies. It has tradition, interesting characters with crazy superstitions, but we really didn’t need a movie about the minor leagues. Especially a movie with “Major League” in the title.
If we don’t care enough to watch the WNBA, why are we gong to care about a movie about the WNBA.
Another shocking plot twist, he falls for a woman on his team and she’s so pissed at him when he reveals himself, but then they make up by the end of the movie. Also, he’s a better person because of his experiences.
Is there a sports movie Mad-Lib that they use for these things?
See “Bud, Air”
I’ll just go ahead and put down the plot summary for this one:
Caddyshack II returns to the exclusive, but crazy country club seen in the original Caddyshack. This time it’s the blue-bloods against the blue collars as a loud, vulgar, self-made millionaire tries to join the stuffy upper-crust club after his daughter falls in love with one of the members.
Naturally, the boisterous millionaire is rejected by the genteel jerks. He retaliates by buying the golf course and turning it into an ultra-tacky amusement park.
Merry mayhem ensues, but in the end, the snobs learn a valuable lesson, the millionaire gets to join, and his daughter and her lover are finally united.
Yes, that really happened.
After four very solid Rocky movies, you really had no choice but to see the fifth one. It was completing a circle.
Only, the fifth Rocky was so mind-blowingly bad that it not only stained the series as a whole, it made you question everything you thought Rocky was about.
At the end of the day, it’s best to just pretend this one never happened. Even though I’ve heard "Rocky Balboa" wasn’t terrible, I still can’t bring myself to watch it after "Rocky V."