The Return of Roger Federer's Secret Weapon (Humor)

Robert OrzechowskiAnalyst IMarch 10, 2010

As the 2010 spring season for tennis gets under way, Roger Federer has been looking for new ways to combat his younger competitors. 

He has worked on his training, shot expertise, and basic overall fitness to keep his No. 1 ranking in tennis. 

Now players on the tennis circuit have a new Federer weapon to fear.  The pony tail is back!

Roger Federer announced today that he will be sporting a ponytail for Wimbledon 2010, the likes of which saw him defeat Pete Sampras back in 2001. 

"I cannot say how different I will look, you know but it will be interesting to see.  I may or may not add a goatee in there to shake up my look, you know? 

"My bandanna has been becoming useless with my hair getting shorter and shorter so it is time to make them fully effective again."

Rafael Nadal was not impressed upon hearing this news.  "Ah, cheet.  All dis time, I hef been trying to luke like heem and he go and change again.  Maybe I gonna go back to my old fashion too, no?  Maybe I bit him like old times too, no? Anoder four French Open trophy for me and tray for di Roger, yes?"

Andy Murray upon hearing this development, refused to revisit his own past.  "I couldn't if I wanted to.  My hair is receding faster than a low tide.  My days of looking like a billy goat are over.  My stubble only comes out when I get a zit.  No thanks!"

There has been no word on whether James Blake will respond by sporting a youthful afro of his own.

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