The Dikembe Mutombo Mpolondo Mukamba Jean-Jacques Wamutombo Award
Many people in the United States decide for one reason or another that their given name is overplayed, too hard to pronounce, too long, misspelled, and for countless other reasons decide that it's time for a change. It is only in sports in which people change their names in order to hide their criminal past. Yes, although this is technically a minor offense, it is still an asshole move, because remember Ron Mexico is still Michael Vick, and Adam Jones.. is well, still Pacman Jones. You can't just change your name like it's a dirty pair of underwear or a jersey number and think everything's changed. I for one will be referring to him as Jones, and hoping that he plays better than the running back who wore the same number and name before him.
The 1992 Angola National Team Award
United States 116 - Angola 48
There aren't a lot of things worse than running the score up on someone, but insulting them in the process is pretty high up on the list of assholeness. For example, if you were asked to point to Angola on a map, you would more than likely insult them because who keeps up with where Angola is anyway? Let alone take the time to decide if the Angola National Team would play some sort of competitive basketball. We award the New England Patriots with the team most likely to be rubbing salt in someone's wounds. In organized sports it's one thing to win, but the Patriots were in the business of being professional assholes.
Let's look at their resume:
- They signed Randy Moss for practically nothing, and got the #5 draft pick after a 19-1 season.
- They made a mockery of the AFC East division.
- Three weeks in a row they provoked a team to cry in front of national Television cameras.
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3 months ago
Since you proclaimed the Patriots as being professional a$$holes, please tell us how the Pats should've not run up the score. Should they hand the ball over to the closest defensive player? Should they take a knee on all 4 downs, resulting in a turnover? Should they simply stop sending the offense onto the field, simply taking penalties for delay of game? Should they just spike the ball each play? Should the recievers intentionally drop passes or intentionally miss them? Should the RB's just run straight out to the side in order to not gain any yards? You've obviously put so much thought into your article, I'd like to know your solution to this.
The Pats scored a lot of points-and even spanked some people along the way. That's not their fault. The offense goes out on the field to score, not to coddle the opposing teams defense. The Pats did a lot of going for it on 4th down rather than kicking the easy field goal in order to give the opposing teams defense another chance to stop them from scoring.....if they can't stop them from scoring, that's their fault, not the Patriots fault. Aside from that, the team that holds the largest margin of victory in a game is the Redskins...not the Patriots.
Let me pick apart your "resume" that you created for the Pats:
"They signed Randy Moss for practically nothing, and got the #5 draft pick after a 19-1 season."
So? What's your point? That the office and staff did a good job on the draft and on retaining (arguably) the #1 reciever in the entire NFL after having a record breaking/record setting season? Why is a bad thing?
"They made a mockery of the AFC East division"
What are you saying? Becuase they won every game in their division that they're jerks? You don't realize that other teams were talking a heck of a lot more trash than the Pats were...yet you still accuse the Pats of "making a mockery of the AFC East division". Does this revert back to not hurting anyone's feelings? Should the Pats not have shown up for a few games in their division just to allow the other teams in the AFC east to win a few more games? Crazy.
"Three weeks in a row they provoked a team to cry in front of national Television cameras. "
HUH? Please tell me what you're talking about? I'd like links, too please. I'm guessing that this all goes back to the "don't hurt their feelings" bit that I keep referring too. I'm sure that the Pats entered every game with the mentality "What can we do to make these grown men, these professional athaletes, these 6'6" 280 lb men cry on national TV?!?!?!" That last point you made (#3) is really stretching it IMHO.
Seriously, you just sound a tad bitter about the Pats. If your team did what the Pats did, you'd be extatic. Why is it ok for other teams to have record breaking seasons, run up scores and make opponents cry....but not ok for the Pats to do it?
//Aside...like the picture you chose for the article ;)
3 months ago
1. They got the #7 pick not #5 because SF was dumb enough to give it to them so they could draft Joe Staley
2. They finished 18-1 and Moss took less money so that the team had more wiggle room with the salary cap
3. It's not there fault the AFC East couldn't stop them... like steve said, what do you want them to do, start kneeling the ball in the 3rd quarter... defensive players get paid to play defense and offensive players get paid to score points
3 months ago
Thank you for your insightful comments. You are correct on the notion that this is not sunday school and in the NFL you play to your best ability at all times and along the way, a few teams may get their toes stepped upon if their level of play is lacking. With that said, I still felt for the purposes of this "awards" show the Patriots did indeed take it to a level that was above the game of football, and more of a matter of principalities which we won't go into since it's been beaten to death since week 2. And furthermore there is no other team "to hate" worse at this time than the New England Patriots.
The resume is just part of the reason why people not only hate the Pats but they have grown to loathe them. But I could agree to dismiss both #1 and #2 as they are really irrevelent but I think you are really underestimating the importance of #3 in relation to this article. t highlight #3 as the main
There is no other team currently in professional sports at this time that could anger an entire league of players such as the New England Patriots did the National Football League. Nobody on the field wants to be showed up, and as the wins and records kept racking up, you could sense that each game wasn't just your typical leave it all on the field game and collect the check at the end of the day. Players were really giving it all they had to stop the arrogance of the Patriots. The three game stretch I am referring to was week 11 - 13. Remember the end of the Ravens game the intensity and emotion of Bart Scott? The games were getting personal, only a truly hated team could provoke that type of universal hatred, and in the purposes of this article, they are much deserved to have the award they worked hard to achieve.
3 months ago
Okay. First off, everybody seems to be taking Doc's comments a little bit too seriously. And Doc, don't go back on anything. I can totally see your point. The pats are the smartest and best managed team probably in NFL history and yes, people cant stand them because of it. I fully understand why they got the Ahole award. To me your comments dont give off tones of hatred as much as they do back-handed compliments. Steve, for as much as you knocked the Doc for knocking the patriots, you sure were defending them pretty hard. There was a little anger in your words, a little resentment. But its all good.... if your pats fan, then do what you do.... its just kinda odd because for about three seconds into your rebuttal it looks like your going to give a good, strong, non-bias opinion. Boy.... was i fooled... happy fourth to everybody... man i cant wait until football season so we can really have something to argue about... ya feel me...?
DRU
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