Finding someone gullible is the key. The beer bitch is usually gullible and doesn't arrive at the tailgate as early as the others. Also, he is the guy who comes with his beer, and then asks if he can bum room in someone's ice chest. This has beer bitch written all over it. Remember it.
3.) Recreational Activities - If you are following these steps to the tee, you must bring along some type of recreational activity. If you have a good location with plenty of open room, you have to have a football. It is considered illegal in some states to tailgate without a football. Another thing to consider is holey board.
When the beer starts to flow and people start to arrive, the holey board games get very intense. Also, if you tailgate at the parade grounds at LSU and you get out there early, a pitching wedge and a nine iron along with about half a dozen golf balls is a good idea. Practice your short game while waiting for the slackers to arrive. If you are a sit down tailgater, a deck of cards is always a good idea.
2.) Good Friends - No doubt that a good time can be had at a tailgate with just a core group of friends. But don't be afraid to let some of your friends invite some of their friends, no matter how much they mooch off of your food and beer. As far as tailgating is concerned, we believe the more the merrier. If the mooching continues after a while, then it is okay to kick their ass, but do it politely. Then, politely tell them that if they want to join in on the fun, it is time to contribute.
I got away from why I had this so high on the list. You being there with all of your closest friends celebrating one common thing is a high like no other. It's not like going to a party in college where everyone has their own separate agenda. Everyone at a tailgate is there for the same reason. It's a daylong event culminating with a football game at night.
1.) Dedication - Everything listed above is irrelevant if you don't have No.1. If you are going to tailgate seriously, certain sacrifices will have to be made. For those of you responsible for hauling much of the equipment, you must accept the fact that your vehicle will smell like ass for the entire fall season and part of the winter.
If you are going to tailgate with friends, make sure you tailgate with those friends who are as truly dedicated and psychotic as you. This may hurt other friends’ feelings who want to arrive a bit later. That is their problem. If they want to arrive later and go somewhere else, oh well. If they want to arrive later and join you, welcome them with open arms. Also, be smart about your dedication.
Budget for your tailgate. Think about what needs to be done and start planning in the springtime.
There you have it. 10 things that are essential to making any tailgate a success. Please keep in mind that I am aware that there are other necessities, but I felt these were the most important. Now, that I have laid the groundwork, go out there and do me proud.
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