The 2010 Athlete WAG Awards
The 16th Annual SAG Awards were held this weekend and that got me thinking. The Screen Actors Guild acronym sounds suspiciously like my favorite actronym: WAG (meaning, of course, Wives And Girlfriends).
So if they can hold the SAG Awards, I should be able to trot out my first WAG Awards. Because in the world of sports significant others, there's more to life than just hotness.
We'll be breaking them down into four categories: Best Drama, Best Comedy, Hottest Newcomer, and WAG of the Year. I'll give the nominees for each, then the winner. Enjoy.
Best Drama Nominee: Gabrielle Union
Already rumored to be having an affair with married NBA superstar Dwyane Wade, Gabrielle Union got called out in May of last year by an unnamed NBA player's wife.
The unnamed woman claimed that Union was the homewrecker of all homewreckers in the NBA. That she had affairs with all types of players, including the married ones.
To back it up, the newly divorced Wade and Union are now officially a couple.
Best Drama Nominee: Layla Kiffin
When her husband abruptly left Tennessee for USC, Layla Kiffin stayed out of the spotlight for the most part. Aside from everyone excited to see her living in southern California, she wasn't really a story.
But then an old story about a car crash came into play, with some reports even saying that Layla was the one behind the wheel, not Lane. Or that Lane got into the wreck after he was out partying with coeds.
Either way, Layla got thrust back into the spotlight, which is a good place to be for a woman that fine.
Best Drama Nominee: Nicole Scherzinger
After two years of dating Formula One driver Lewis Hamilton, Pussycat Dolls front woman Nicole Scherzinger and him split up early this year.
Nicole, who had called Hamilton her soulmate before, was a fixture around his races and was seemingly always around. They claim to still be friends and say they want to focus on their careers. I don't buy it.
You don't end a two year relationship on good terms, it just doesn't happen.
Best Drama Winner: Elin Woods
Do I even need to go over it?
The mistresses, the car wreck, the golf club, the possible divorce... everything about Elin Woods and her husband have been nothing but drama for the past two months. This one was a landslide.
Best Comedy Nominee: Adriana Lima
They have been married for a few years and even have a child together, but as long as Adriana Lima is married to Marco Jaric, I will find it hysterically funny.
How does that happen? And can I put odds on it not lasting when his NBA money runs out?
Best Comedy Nominee: Kendra Wilkinson
Along with Adriana Lima, another hottie dating a scrub Hall of Famer, Kendra's situation is funny because she's so much more famous than her husband Hank Baskett.
When Baskett was released by the Eagles and subsequently picked up by the Colts, the headlines read: Kendra's Husband Finds A Job!
Best Comedy Nominee: Kim Sears
Andy Murray's hot little number split up with him late last year. Did he cheat on her? Could she not handle the fame? Was he just a jerk?
Nope. She just couldn't take his seven-hours-a-day Playstation habit. Seriously, man, when you have a girlfriend this hot, you do not need to be playing video games, much less for seven hours a day. That's ridiculous.
Best Comedy Winner: Brittany Binger
I'm still laughing at this one.
Grady Sizemore sends his girlfriend nearly nude pictures of himself, which I think is funny enough on its own. Who does that other than stupid high schoolers?
Then Brittany's stalker hacks into her computer, finds those pictures, and releases them all over the internet, prompting a frantic tweet from Binger stating that the two were still together and it wasn't some kind of breakup revenge plot.
I'm hoping this will get even funnier when spring training opens and Sizemore's teammates really get to make fun of him for this.
Hottest Newcomer Nominee: Ana Ivanovic
The rumors that tennis star and major hottie Ana Ivanovic was dating golfer Adam Scott were finally confirmed this year. Already one of the hottest athletes on the planet, Ana had her sights set on becoming one of the hottest WAGs as well.
While their relationship is just about a year old, I've aleady expressed my hopes that Ana shows up on the links more often. With no Tiger and Elin, we could use a reason to tune in.
Hottest Newcomer Nominee: Rihanna
At one point after breaking up with Chris Brown, Rihanna may have possibly been dating Andrew Bynum, but now has been seen with the Dodgers' Matt Kemp.
While Kemps agent says the two are just friends, I can already see that Rihanna is starting to develop a thing for athletes, so whether it's with Kemp or somebody else, I look forward to Rihanna joining the WAG ranks for good.
Hottest Newcomer Nominee: Hayden Panettiere
This was one of the closest races of the WAG Awards. Hayden Panettiere was seen canoodling with boxer Wladimire Klitschko at the beginning of the new year, automatically vaulting her to the top of boxing's hottest WAGs.
As much as I question her taste (or sanity), Hayden hasn't officially confirmed her relationship with the big oaf, so I don't think she gets the award quite yet.
Hottest Newcomer Winner: Anna Burns
The winner goes to the sexy lady that was up with Wes Welker watching the Patriots playoff game this year when he was hurt. Everyone wanted to know who she was.
Turns out, we already knew her. It was Anna Burns, the crazy hot Hooters International Contest winner. We don't know how long she's been dating the scrappy slot receiver, but she's new to us.
Wes Welker gives hope to fast, scrappy white guys everywhere in more ways than one.
WAG of the Year Nominee: Kate Hudson
They say that behind every great man, there's a great woman. Which may have explained why A-Rod was never great in the clutch, until this year. What changed? Well, he started dating Kate Hudson, that's what changed.
Suddenly A-Rod was performing in the clutch and shone brightly in the playoffs. To Yankee fans, she was an angel sent from heaven to help their embattled slugger.
Then after the Yankees won the World Series, she vanished, like a super hot Bagger Vance for baseball.
WAG of the Year Nominee: Kim Kardashian
Before the NFL season started, we were treated to the terrible news that Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush had split up. But thankfully they quickly got back together and the Saints went on a tear.
Now, rumor has it that Reggie Bush is just one win away (not just any win, the Super Bowl) from proposing to her. If that's not a reason to root for the Saints, I don't know what is.
If he gets a ring, she gets a ring, and we all get to watch Kim Kardashian for as long as Reggie Bush can stay on the field.
WAG of the Year Nominee: Brooklyn Decker
Super fine model Brooklyn Decker and tennis star Andy Roddick wed this past year. That alone should land her a spot on this list.
But in addition to that, Decker rivals Eva Longoria in time spent in the stands supporting her man. And while Roddick always seems so close to winning a major again, keeping Brooklyn watching from the sidelines looking gorgeous makes me want him to succeed even more.
WAG of the Year Winner: Minka Kelly
I don't care who you are, if you can officially take Derek Jeter off the market, you automatically win the WAG of the Year. After making his way through models, actresses, singers, and beauty queens, Jeter finally found the one woman he could stick with, and I can't argue with his choice.
I keep finding myself more and more astounded at how incredible Minka Kelly is. And I also would be remiss in not mentioning that she, like Kate Hudson, helped the Yankees overcome their World Series drought with her influence on Jeter.
With her locked down for the future, who knows how long Jeter can extend his career and how many more titles the Yankees can win. Such is the power of Minka.