Yesterday was my wedding anniversary. After being spoiled rotten with gorgeous jewelry over the years, I was hoping hubby would think of something more, well, me, when it came time to exchanging presents.
So imagine my surprise when I opened my gift—a gorgeous Spalding "Never Flat" football. I had tears in my eyes. God, I married well. He so gets me.
As I held that ball in my hands, my leg started to quiver. With my fingers laying across the laces and my grip getting tighter on the ball, I realized I was ready. I need some football. Now.
It's that dreaded time of year—post-NBA Finals and right smack dab in the middle of the death throes of baseball.
Don't get me wrong—baseball is OK, but I fervently believe that it's a kids' game that grownups ruined. It bores me. I need a contact sport. I need football.
I'm already looking forward to that first football TV commercial. My favorite one? Where the guy bends over to look at something and this deranged woman comes up behind him, cups her hands underneath his crotch, looks to the right with this psychotic look on her face and yells, "Hut-Hut!" Hilarious.
It's that time of year where I start to actually miss Lee, Herb, and Chris. And Lou and Mark. Although I work for ESPN's rival, I miss them nonetheless.
I miss that opening music theme to College Game Day. The students with their silly signs, bobbing up and down, behind Lee and Herb talking about the upcoming games. The cheerleaders standing on the shoulders of their male teammates, leading yells to the masses. Dang it, I need to see a mascot head and some helmet stickers.
I miss Lee tapping his Ticonderoga pencil on the desk. God help me—I miss Lou's halftime locker room pep talks. Spit and all.
It started with the Spring games in April. At the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum, I actually took off my cowboy boots and ran my toes through that sweet turf. I imagined all the great players that had walked on this sweet-smelling sod.
I walked through the tunnel leading out to the field and touched my hand on those crumbling, old walls. How many great players have touched these walls as they passed through to play in front of 90,000 fans?
I actually remember thinking, "Wow, LAPD could have probably gotten some of O.J. Simpson's DNA lifted off the concrete." There's some history here.
I stood near Pete Carroll on the sidelines—yeah, I cheat a little on the sidelines and tend to step over that 25-yard line barrier between the press and the players. Shhh. Don't tell anyone. I just like to feel the intensity of the players and coaches when I stand near them.
I can already hear the sounds of the marching bands drowning out the sounds of the visiting teams' fans. I can smell the hot dogs and nachos, and taste those $8 beers. It's stuck in my brain now.
I can see the fans clasping their hands behind their heads as they look at the last seconds of the clock tick down—will their team pull off the upset?
I can hear the impending smack from all the bloggers as they get ready to pronounce their team/conference/cheerleaders/band the greatest in college football.
Yeah, I'm ready to see the Oregon Ducks' new uniforms.
I'm ready to see if Weis can right the Titanic he currently is captaining through treacherous waters.
I'm ready to see if Urban has found a way to fix the Gators' secondary.
I'm ready to see if the Buckeyes really are as good as everyone says they are. Again.
I'm ready to meet the new Cinderella who'll upset a Georgia, USC, Wisconsin, or Oklahoma.
I'm ready to perhaps hear Keith Jackson say, "One more year, then I retire for good."
I'm ready to hear 100 renditions of "Rocky Top" when Tennessee visits the UCLA Bruins.
I'm ready to put away my DVD collection of USC 2007 football games and watch some live games instead.
I'm ready to hear the wails of "unfair" when a team isn't ranked No. 1, and ready to hear another team get chants of "overrated" when they take the field.
I'm ready for the "D" and fence signs, and "SportsCenter is next" signs.
I'm ready to get new batteries for my digital voice recorder and fire off some questions to coaches and players.
I'm ready to ditch all the college football magazines on my bedside table and see if the prognosticators were correct in their predictions.
OMG—I miss Sun Belt football.
As I sit here spilling my guts out, I hold that football even closer to my face. It's not pigskin, but I can smell it. It's a faint smell that will get stronger around late July, and permeate my every sense by late August.
The football, resting comfortably in my hands, has inspired me to hang on for two more months. We'll get through this.
Am I the only one who feels this way? Is there an easy button I can push to get me through the next two months?
Thank God I married well.
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3 months ago
congrats on your anniversary and on a great article.
i don't know whether to be happy for you inking such a great column or mad that you made me crave football even more than i already do, like you're waving a juicy steak in front of the starving.
mmmmmmmm steak.
3 months ago
Thanks Justin! And I'm a carnivore too. I hear ya on the steaks. A nice medium rare baseball-cut floats my boat. With sushi and sashimi. Oh man....surf and turf rocks. Hold a football in your hands to get you through the next two months..it actually helps! :)
3 months ago
This is really the worst time of the year. It's like the never-ending car ride to an anticipated vacation resort. Are we there, yet?! I've found myself sneaking a peek at re-run sports on ESPNU to get my sports fix. It's sad really. I cannot wait until August 30. Until then, I'll be catching NFL off-season news, the Euro Soccer finals and a baseball season that's entirely too long.
from 3 months ago
The Olympics will kill two weeks.....I love those games. But what do we do other than that? I like soccer, but more Cup matches. By the way...first game is August 28! You can take two days off your countdown clock.
3 months ago
How long before Lou pulls the newspaper magic trick this season? I give him to week two.
How long before Mark May picks against the Gators? Again, I'll go week two--when he tries to convince us that Miami is primed for a big upset.
How long before Corso takes back his "South Carolina will win the East this year" statement? I'm thinking week three, moments after the GA game.
Verne Lundquist, I'm ready for your "Oh my!"
We just have to make it through July, y'all. We can do it.
Good stuff, Lisa.
from 3 months ago
Tim- And not only will Mark pick against the Gators, he'll praise USC no matter how bad we play in our first game. (Remember the Idaho opener last year? (Sigh) Thanks Tim!
3 months ago
Happy Anniversary! I hope my future wife loves sports as much as you do.
I too am dying for football. Sadly, I am making my fantasy football rankings already. I can't wait.
from 3 months ago
Ok Andrew....you're an addict too. And you need to marry a woman who likes sports if you love sports. It's so much easier! My hubby played football, (division 1A and beyond), so he totally gets my addiction. I gave up on fantasy football...I kept forgetting to check to see which players were on a bye last season.
;)
from 3 months ago
I can do fantasy football. It's fantasy baseball that bugs me. You have to check every day and see who has an off day, and who you should play instead. I don't have time for that. :D (As sad as that sounds based on my previous comment...)
3 months ago
Good article. Although I am a huge yankee fan, this is a slow time of year for sports and i am looking forward to aug 30 and PENN STATE FOOTBALL's opening kick off. Thats the one thing you forgot in your article.
I'm ready for more debating about should Joe stay or go!
I'm ready for the new spread offense that Penn State will be playing this year, circa 2005!
I'M READY FOR A BIG TEN CHAMPIONSHIP! (and more)
from 3 months ago
Paul-
OH my...I already debated Joe Pa....let him leave when he's ready...he IS Penn State football. No way does he ever leave until he's ready to go on his own terms. Good luck to your Nits!
3 months ago
Andrew-
I tried fantasy baseball..had Utley, Uggla and Chipper Jones....I didn't know you had to check every day for off days...I finally just stopped doing it...but as of right now, I'm still in the running because of those sluggers....I hate it though. I feel your pain.
from 3 months ago
You tried fantasy baseball and had Utley, Uggla, and Jones? I tried fantasy baseball and had Nick Punto, Chris Burke, and Juan Uribe.
3 months ago
Good Golly, now I'm pumped!! Bring on football season!! Our local sports talk station counts down daily the number of days until the kickoff of football season...I think they start right after the bowl games. It's just the way of life here in Birmingham. We feel your pain.
from 3 months ago
DScot....holy smokes! Is this the year for a certain school in Bama? I hate to ask, but are you a UAB, Auburn or Tide fan? There's so many great schools down there. I was in Dega for the Spring race last year and had a blast there meeting Tony Stewart! You Bama folks are crazy sports nuts. I hope your team does well this year! I feel YOUR pain! Bring it on!
3 months ago
First of all, happy anniversary, and second, you're not the only one who feels this way.
I'm on vacation in LA right now and one of the first things I did was go by the Rose Bowl just to look at it and grasp the significance of it all...so many great players have passed through those gates and all I could wish was that it were September and football season were starting.
These two months are gonna suck, but at least you have others that feel the same way, so you aren't alone
3 months ago
David-
The RB does indeed have some great history. She's like an old friend! Hope you're having fun here in Cali...the weather is pretty nice-not too hot.
I feel so much better knowing I'm not the only freak out there. Wait a minute. Does that make you a freak too?
Thanks for the best wishes! :)
3 months ago
You still have the Arena League playoffs this weekend...
Enjoy!
3 months ago
Adam-
I'll take that. I can watch all of the NFL rejects and druggies play. Yay! Pretty soon, we aren't going to be able to tell the diff between the NFL and AL if they keep letting these players back in for a 7th chance.
3 months ago
I LOVED this article haha. Oh and Congratulations on the great anniversary, that husband of yours sure did get a catch!
I cant tell you how many times I have ventured into the Coliseum. I live in Northern California, but I have been a Southern-er for quite some time. And trust me when I say this, my LIFE revolves around college football. If I were to meet a girl that loves college ball half as much as you do, I swear I will drop to my knee and propse to her with whatever I have in my pocket at the time.
I remember the first time I went to USC's campus when I was 7 (12 years ago!), My uncle was the dean of Arizona State, and they just so happened to playing the Trojans. Of course I was wearing my Arizona State Sun Devils shirt, over sized because it belonged to my dad. And just the feeling I got when I would hear the crowd scream after a touchdown, I didnt know what to do so I would just scream at whatever happened. And even to this day I get goosebumps when I am in Pasadena. I think every college football fan should at least visit the Rose Bowl at least once in there life. The NFL is not even fun to watch for me, only the draft because I would have followed those drafted platers REAL careers. I love being in college so far, (oh and just for the record, I will be transferring to USC in 2010, my uncle tried his best to coax me into ASU, but I am a Trojan through and through) and I cant wait for my next 4 years (a PhD),
and I cant wait for your next article, Bravo!
from 3 months ago
Aww Reggie! You sweetheart! Enjoy your time at USC...I did! Loved it there! Make lots of contacts and use them. Hey, there's lots of us girls who like sports...you just can't find us because we are too busy throwing football parties instead of being at bars. :)
from 3 months ago
Thank you =]. I will, and throw in the fact that I am enamored with college football, I should make plenty of friends haha. Hopefully my 3.5 GPA will get me in!! That school is too competitive. Hahah I can't even drink, remember 19. Hmm, I really want to find these football parties you mention haha. I am sure I would make lots of "contacts"
3 months ago
Great Job!! With this BCS nonsense I said I was going to begin to separate from college football untill there was a playoff...but I can't, I miss it just llike you. This article hit home...I am ready to see the Garnet n Gold now, thanks for the wake-up call.
from 3 months ago
CJ-
Don't you dare leave College Football. We need you, and you are hereby initiated into our support group! We can do this together. Just start watching ESPN classic and cheer for your team even when you know they lost/won. It's good to get the heart pumping. WAKE-UP!
3 months ago
Is there an easy button I can push to make the San Diego State Aztecs play good football?
Or one that I can push to give Lou Holtz a napkin for his on screen performances?
Or one that I can push that will blow up the BCS computers?
from 3 months ago
Umm...no easy button for Aztec football. Ever since Air-Coryell, the Aztecs haven't fared well. Faulk was fun to watch though. Luckily, SDSU is still a great place to go drown your sorrows-that school can party!
from 3 months ago
You got that right. That drug bust won't bring us down!
They don't call us America's Finest City for nothing.
Finest beaches, finest weather, and finest drugs...
Haha naw, I'll tough it out. I believe in Chuck Long.
Kind of.
3 months ago
my wife went to sleep during the sugar bowl IN the dome. why didn't i marry you!!!
from 3 months ago
she slept at a football game? ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME??????????????????????????? I'm embarrassed for my fellow sister. Yikes.
3 months ago
Happy Anniversary Lisa, interestingly my parents anniversary was today.
Don't worry, Belotti and Co. will find some new combination. I don't think they've tried the gold helmets with all whites on the road yet...
from 3 months ago
trist...I actually photoshopped the Ducks new unis...I think I have created the perfect uni...it will premiere next week...I stink at photo shop but have a very creative touch! ;)
3 months ago
Great article, I couldn't have said it better myself. I can't wait to see 'The Best Damn Band In the Land' spell out script Ohio on the 'Shoe...see the seniors dot the i....See 110,000 screaming fans cheer on my beloved Buckeyes. Spring football has come and gone, but late August football is right around the corner. Let's hope we can all find something constructive to do and pass the time.
Great article again, I loved it!
from 3 months ago
Mike thanks.....and the dotted "i" rocks! I still think my Trojans have the best band, but can't argue with Ohio State as #1. Let's just say the 13th of September should be a heckuva a show! Are you going?
3 months ago
Happy anniversary! Yeah my ex girlfriend always wanted to leave Tennessee games early until I made her stay for the Tennessee Waltz that the "Pride of the Southland" plays at the end if each game, she never left a game early after that.
Yeah I spend the doldrums of summer watching my dad's and my old Tennessee tapes, some of them I review here on BR.
Great article! Less then two months till it's football time in Tennessee!
from 3 months ago
Michael...thanks...sometimes girls just gotta vent! You trained the g/f well. My hearty congrats! But then you broke up? Man, that's harsh.
3 months ago
Happy Anniversary!
My husband gets me too. He is taking me to the Notre Dame v Michigan game for our 10th anniversary! I was so afraid he would go traditional and get me jewelry.
Best part is, he is a West Virginia grad:-) HERE COME THE IRISH BABEE!!!
from 3 months ago
Lanie-
Atta girl! A fellow football girl. That should be a great game! Good luck to your Irish! :)
3 months ago
Hey Lisa,
Heartfelt best wishes on celebrating another anniversary. I'd say you married well! Nice.
You had me at, "....college football..." The only thing the comes even remotely close to ANY college football game would be a college basketball game. Any college basketball game.
Have to take issue with one image you painted with words. "...ready to see the new Oregon Ducks uniforms." Just about tossed my cookies thinking about that possibility. Coach Bellotti is not just a great coach, but has to have the best team of recruiters in the nation (including Pflug, most recently at WSU and ASU). How else could you convince image conscious teenagers to consider donning the most hideous uniform color combinations ever conceived? In front of tens of thousands of people? The Duck uniforms are so bad, they warrant a 6 point advantage in every game due to the nausea they induce on their opponents.
Oh my. Ranting on about Oregon uniforms reveals just how desperate this college football fanatic has become in the off season.
Awesome prose Lisa.
Is it August yet? Is it August yet? Is it August yet?
Cougar Lew
from 3 months ago
Lew-
Thanks Coug! Hey.....I never said I liked the unis....just looking forward to Phil's new designs. Have to tell you...the blackish-green helmets rock! I love the high-tech look of them. Plus the iron-look shoulder pads...although they sometimes look like feathers. Hmmm.
3 months ago
Happy anniversary and great article. I'm more of an NFL guy who follows college football most around bowl season when I fill out the office pool and research the prospects around draft day but I feel your pain (I'm a BC fan who fell off the wagon during the pre Matt Ryan post Doug Flutie doldrums, I can't in good conscience become a fan again so quickly, especially considering BC's probable last place ACC finish without Cherilus, Ryan, Silva, or Tribble... that would make me a bandwagoner *gasp*)
I love the Red Sox but it isn't nearly as fun to watch a sox game as it is to watch a pats game (unless the sox beat the yankees in some dramatic or surprising way but that's another matter.)
I can only take so much baseball when basketball, football, and even Hockey are in their offseasons. The anticipation before football season is a killer... I may even watch preseason this year to get my football fix earlier. (the college game may also be an option but so many good teams start out with cupcakes, FCS teams, and DII schools that August is just college preseason anyway.)
~Max
3 months ago
Max-
Believe it or not, if you watch Pac-10 football, you won't see a lot of cupcakes in August.
USC plays Virginia, UCLA plays Tennessee, Oregon plays Washington, Washington State plays Oklahoma State, Oregon State plays Stanford (you never know when Stanford will pull an upset), and Cal plays Michigan State.
Lots of really good games there!
Thanks for the good wishes and props!
3 months ago
Great article, as many others have said, it just makes you that much more anxious for football season to roll on around. :)
from 3 months ago
Thanks Gage!
3 months ago
forgot one
-ready to see the trojans lose 2 home games this season, to the buckeyes and golden bears!
3 months ago
Bowl-
Yikes! Hope you're wrong on that one! ;p
I know they won't lose in November...they are undefeated in November under Pete Carroll. I hope Tedford doesn't try to mess with that record.
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