Bleacher Report: Philadelphia Edition

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Under Tom Coughlin's Coaching Tree: Ghosts of Christmas Past

By (Featured Columnist) on December 4, 2009

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The holidays are here and so many of you have been asking for a certain gift.

So I wrote a letter to Tom "Claus" Coughlin to see if he could help us good boys and girls.

"So you want a new coordinator do ya", Tom "Claus" Coughlin said.

Yes, we do...father christmas! We've paid all our PSL money to the Mara's and we've come every week...even when the Giants gave up a 14 point lead we stayed to the end.

Well, lets look under the Coughlin Coaching Tree..shall we. It's always a fun and bizarre place to start.

Standing first in line for Santa I scream, "Please Tom get rid of these bums!" But then I pause and think...who would Tom hire? All coaches at one time or another circle back to that old familiar group called the boys club.

You know these guys...these are the guys that have been riding Tom's sleigh for the last 25 years. These are the same guys that Tom has given a job to time & time again, even though they have failed.

We call this the "Coaching Tree"!

Some guys have gone on to super start'em...but most of these guys just have become misfits and under achievers. Most of these I wouldn't touch if they were giving away free seat licenses and some I can only dream would want to come back! (hint)

The title was donated by B/R's Feature Columnist...Jeff Shull. Thanks Jeff!

Dick Jauron

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Could Dick be the new Giants Defensive Coordinator?

Do you even like this guy? He's definitely is not a dependable head coach.

But he does know defense! Dick Jauron was the Defensive Coordinator for the Jacksonville Jags under Coughlin from 1995 to 1998.

Since then he has been the head coach of the Bears & the Bills.

He got fired two or three weeks ago...

Bobby Petrino

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Did he not quit on the Falcons after 13 games? Scrooge! Please...he's not cut out for the NFL and he probably loves Arkansas.

Petrino was the QB Coach and the Offensive Coordinator for the Jags under Coughlin from 1999 to 2001.

Lane Kiffin

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Lane Kiffin? Yes, the kid that Al Davis ran out of town on a silver and black horse. Lane was an assistant coach for the Jacksonville Jags under Coughlin in 2000.

This guy is young, full of fire, and comes from a great coaching family, but I have no idea if he can handle New York or would leave Tennessee.

However, he does have a very, hot wife!

Tony Sparano

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Who knew this guy was soooo good. Ya, gotta loves this guy. Unless Miami fires him, he's not going anywhere soon.

To his credit, Tony has put the life back in the Dolphins and he is working with less than a full deck of healthy players.

Sparano was the tight end coach for Jags under in Coughlin 2002.

Tim Lewis

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Tim was a very good NFL player for the Green Bay Packers, just not a good coach.

As the Defensive Coordinator for the NY Giants under Coughlin in 2004 to 2006 the great NY Giants defense was soft as the toilet paper in a 5 star hotel.

I would never watch another Giants football game if Tim Lewis came back and took over for Sheridan.

Steve Spagnuolo

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Spag's. Yup we all ready miss this guy!

What's it gonna take to bring him back? A move to London by the Rams? Two demoralizing, loosing seasons? It seems highly unlikely he would come back but we're putting Spag's on our Holiday Wish List.

Steve Spagnuolo deserves all the credit for bringing the NY Giants to Superbowl 42. He started a bit slow, but as he got to know his personnel he thrived and so did the team.

The late, great Jim Johnson taught him well. He would be proud.

John Hufnagel

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John Hufnagal. It's very hard to figure this guy out. Is he good or is he bad. We really might need Santa to figure this one out or one of the magic eight balls that was under tree when I nine.

This guy was drafted by the Denver Bronocos after having a 3 stellar years at Penn State. He had a 26-3 record over that time and was the first PSU QB to throw over 2000 yards.

As QB coach he was a rock star...tutoring Peyton Manning, Mark Brunell, Tom Brady and Eli Manning. Hufnagal was also the Giants Offensive Coordinator from 2004 to 2006.

His absolutely predictable play calling got him canned.

At this point the NFL had figured him out, so he fled back to Canada and was never seen again. Funny thing....he has won 3 Grey Cups and was voted CFL coach of the year (2008). Good or Bad...we don't want him back.

Kevin Gilbride

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It's that one present under the tree you never asked for, never wanted and would do anything to return. Like a bad sweater.

Over the last 20 years Kevin Gilbride has been the QB coach or the Offensive Coordinator for 6 different teams in NFL! The constant landscape change would lead you to believe his services are not well regarded.

For five years Gilbride ran the run and shoot in Houston. His success was attributed to HOF great Warren Moon.

KILLDRIVE isn't even known for offensive prowess...instead his most famous moment was being punched in the face by Buddy Ryan, the Houston Oilers Defensive Coordinator in 1994 while standing on the sidelines during a nationally televised game.

All because Gilbride's run-and-shoot offense couldn't run out the clock when needed.

How can we give this guy back? Does anyone have a receipt?

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