10) Why is Steve Young so angry about who gets into the NFL Hall of Fame? (I'm betting it has something to do with him having to wear that blazer.)
9) Is the biggest reason why I should choose DirecTV the distasteful nature of cable executives and installers, since that seems to be their most consistent advertising message?
8) Does eating Tostitos make you start hearing slow talking and vapid voices in your head?
7) Why, exactly, should your theoretical preference for one male model over another in an emo vampire movie dictate your choice of fast food?
6) Why does the Jeep ad that talks about how much better Jeep owners are fail to show the vehicle until the last five seconds, or the face of any Jeep owner?
5) Isn't Nuvifone making you slower than everyone else kind of like becoming a voluntary imbecile?
4) Is it really a hardship to not be sitting near people who are eating a McDonald's breakfast?
3) Do I have to talk like an idiot to eat at Outback Steakhouse?
2) Does drinking Bud Light cause a complete lack of knowledge about what is effective or acceptable public behavior?
1) Will owning an iPod Nano make me become an insufferable narcissist?