Mocking the Draft: NBA Draft Picks as Sitcom Characters

Ben Allaire by Senior Analyst Written on June 10, 2008
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Urkel was the prototypical eighties' nerd trapped in a nineties' show.  That’s where these two share an overlapping background.  Brook is a nerd—okay, maybe not—but still he went to Stanford, right?  Sounds nerdy to me. 

He really likes Disney, and Family Matters was shown on ABC, which owns is owned by Disney.  See, I told you these comparisons were going to be deep.

Did I mention that Jaleel White had an NBA.com blog?  Who knew?

 

4. Supersonics, Jerryd Bayless, PG/SG – Al Bundy (Married with Children)

Basically, Jerryd Bayless spent the last year in his own personal hell.

That’s every day for Al Bundy, women’s shoe salesman and husband to Peggy Bundy.  With all the drama surrounding Lute Olson—leaving for good, leaving for a short time, coming back, getting rid of Kevin O’Neill—who needs it? 

Unlike Bundy, however, Bayless had a ticket out of hell and into the NBA.

But Jerryd never scored four touchdowns for Polk High School in the championship game.  Weak.

After all, who can't picture Kevin O’Neill, sitting on the bench, filing his nails: “Jeeerrrrrrryyydd…Let’s play defense...”

 

5. Grizzles, Kevin Love, PF/C – Lowell Mather (Wings)

Most pundits would have put Uncle Phil here because of the poofiness behind the jersey.

I see beyond those few extra pounds.

As an airplane repairman, Lowell worked for anyone who would hire him: Sandpiper, Aeromass, whoever.  Lowell rarely ever carried a full story on Wings, but he always filled the spots with his dry, pithy humor.  

Love rebounds, shoots the three, flings chest passes 70 feet, and plays solid defense.  He's like a cement sealer, filling every crack.  Indeed, you might even describe his game as workmanlike.

 

 

Picks 6-10 are located here.

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written on June 10, 2008 Sports

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