Not By the Hair of My Chin: The 10 Most Grotesque Goatees in the MLB

Chad Waylon Pouncy by Contributor Written on October 25, 2009
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4 Mar 1998:  Jeff Bagwell #5 of the Houston Astros looks on during a spring training game against the Montreal Expos at Osceola County Stadium in Kissimmee, Florida. The Astros defeated the Expos 4-0. Mandatory Credit: Matthew Stockman  /Allsport

There are a number of trends in baseball that I'd love to see die; puka necklaces, the overuse of the phrase "going yard," and shaving cream pies come to mind. At the top of the list, however, is the goatee.

Into the 1980s, the mustache dominated baseball facial hair. Amazing hair patterns graced the upper lips of players such as Rollie Fingers, Catfish Hunter, and Goose Gossage, just to name a few.

Popularized by the likes of actors Burt Reynolds, Charles Bronson, and Chuck Norris, the "stache made players look heroic, if not a bit villainous.

Along came Jeff Bagwell, whose facial folly forever changed the face of baseball aesthetics. Not to say that "Bags" pioneered the baseball goatee, but he certainly brought it to prominence.

Monstrosities such as the "soul patch", the "landing strip", and the "thinker's pad" have taken the league by storm.

Take a look as we examine some of the most grotesque goatees in modern baseball.

As always, be sure to check out Poor Sport Report for some bonus features. You can also follow me on Twitter at waylons_world.

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written on October 25, 2009 Humor

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