The Hottest Sports Catfights Since 2007

By (Analyst) on October 8, 2009

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Catfights are simply part of what makes the human experience worth experiencing.

But what happens when the ladies involved in such encounters are not only hot and female, but also athletically gifted, wealthy, and ferocious?

Well, then we get to feast our eyes upon the list of top Catfights since the year 2007.

JENN STERGER vs. Erin Andrews

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JENN STERGER is a Florida State super fan who gained notoriety by saying that Erin Andrews wasn't very talented...at least, not in the old days when she was a reporter for the Tampa Bay Lightning.

Jenn Sterger vs. ERIN ANDREWS

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Erin Andrews responded to this outrageous insult by executing a flying arm-bar assault upon the Florida State cutie, and then when Sterger refused to tap, Andrews transitioned the attack into a guillotine choke.

Sterger passed out immediately.

DANICA PATRICK vs. Milka Duno

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Nobody really understands race car driving's complicated rules, but evidently the athletes who compete in the "sport" do understand them. And Princess Danica caused quite the stir by impeding Milka Duno, also a female racer of some aesthetic merit.

The argument can be seen here:

Danica Patrick vs. MILKA DUNO

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What the video fails to capture is the sad outcome of this cat fight. Following the pit-stop scuffle, the two women went at it, and only one of them—Danica—walked away with both eyes in tact.

Don't worry, though, Milka is still cute, even though she only has one eye now.

CLAIRE BEVILAQUA vs. Serena Williams

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What does a surfer girl have in common with a Wimbledon champion?

Nothing.

Except that both of them were featured in the ESPN Body Issue. Here's the problem, though. Serena Williams is one of the more attractive super-athletes. Claire Bevilaqua is simply one of the most attractive people who happens to play a sport.

That's not very fair.

Clearly, Serena was not pleased by this dichotomy.

Claire Bevilaqua vs. SERENA WILLIAMS

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Not content to play second fiddle, Serena removed a string from her racket, used it as a makeshift garrote, and promptly removed Bevilaqua's head. Because she is also a vampire, Serena then consumed Claire's blood—her sanguine smile is visible on this magazine cover.

JESSICA ALBA vs. Jessica Biel

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This one is all about Derek Jeter.

Every man wishes that he were Derek Jeter, since the guy has hundreds of millions of dollars, dates every woman he wants, and wears four World Series rings.

But even the A-List chicks feud over Mr. Yankee.

Jessica Alba had him first.

Jessica Alba vs. JESSICA BIEL

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But the younger, hotter, less claustrophobic of the two Jessica's is simply not a human being at all.

She's actually a chimera, the mythical beast that emerges from rocky formations to suffocate her enemies with shovels.

Biel didn't want to be known as the "other" Jessica in Derek Jeter's life, so she had to take care of business. Ultimately, Biel decided to disembowel her arch-rival Jessica Alba using an art deco letter opener.

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