What in the H*#@ are You Doing?: The 10 Most Idiotic Twitter Feeds in Sports
Recently, Maxim came out with its list of the 100 Twitter Accounts Every Guy Should Follow.
That's helpful, but they only touched on sports briefly. That is, of course, where I come in.
You've been hearing a lot about athletes twittering, or tweeting, or twitterpating, but that's not the real issue. Who cares if athletes are doing it if they have nothing worthwhile to say?
Maxim can tell you who to follow. I'll let you know who not to follow, or at least who will entertain you with their stupidity. Here are The 10 Most Idiotic Twitter Feeds in Sports.
Shaquille O'Neal
Yes, Maxim has him on their list of people to follow. I mean, 2.3 million followers can't be wrong, right? Wrong.
It annoys me to no end how Shaquille O'Neal tweets. He's a grown man, one of the most influential in the sports world...yet he tweets like a prepubescent girl!
Every time I read anything Shaq posts on Twitter, I feel like a little part of my brain dies.
Twitxample:
"what shud i be for halloween?"
Carmelo Anthony
If there's one thing I hate, it's people trying to be philosophical all the time. I also hate when they try to push those thoughts on you in stupid little sound bites. I also hate excessive use of caps.
Can you see why I'm not a fan?
Twitxample:
"PEOPLE ARE NOT JEALOUS OF YOUR SUCCESS.......THEY ARE ANGRY AT THEIR OWN FAILURES"
Ron Artest
Have you ever sat on the bus and a crazy person tried to start talking to you? Most of the time you ignore them and hope they go away. You don't invite their craziness into your life.
That's what following Ron Artest is like. It's a daily dose of crazy, deluded, and stupid all in one. Whether he's talking about his reality show or spitting some hot fire, there's almost nothing of value in what Ron-Ron is putting out there.
Oh, and Ron, ghetto doesn't mean using smiley faces.
Twitxample:
"I was trying to pitch a reality show to BET. They told me I was too GHETTO. More Ghetto than some hardcore rappers. Lmao. I guess I'm real:)"
Andre Johnson
Andre Johnson's twitter feed is fascinating...if you really want to know when he gets back into Houston.
His whole feed was basically him saying he just got back to "h town" and asking people what was going on in "h town."
Unfortunately, all of Johnson's tweets have been deleted except for 12. Maybe he got penalized for excessive boredom.
Twitxample:
"What's going on tonight h town"
Terrell Owens
You could say this is the ultimate Terrell Owens fan page, because nobody loves T.O. like T.O.
Simultaneously the best and worst thing about T.O.'s twitter feed is his propensity to start beef with people on it. Whether it's calling out certain Cowboys after he left, Buffalo housing communities, or Rodney Harrison, T.O. is that one guy in your group that just can't keep his mouth shut.
Yeah, it's fun to have him around sometimes because it's never boring, but sometimes you just want him to shut up.
Twitxample:
"I could less about Rodney Harrison! Anybody tht using steroids, yes STEROIDS rodney, is a cheater & cheated the game!"
"Is tht Y u used steroids b/c u were worried about ur stats or ws it b/c u were losing it? Lol! U're a loser & a cheater? Got any steroids I cn borrow?"
"Hey rodney! Send me sum steroids 2 the Bills facility next week!"
Jose Canseco
OK, it's kind of a stretch to really count Jose Canseco as part of the sports world anymore, no matter how much he tries to cling to it. But if you enjoy watching someone desperately cling to relevancy, following Canseco might be your thing.
He continues to tweet about steroid use, even though he has nothing new to say. Not only that, but the majority of his tweets are just retweets from his (presumably scumbag) agent.
If you really want to find out what's going on with Jose (and do you?), just skip the middle man and follow his agent.
Twitxample:
"RT @BernieGernay Last night's interview with Jose Canseco. Thank you to CC Perkinson: http://bit.ly/vsUWd"
Rampage Jackson
Have you ever looked at Rampage Jackson and thought, "That man must have a lot going on up there"?
No? Yeah, I didn't think so. And you would be right. He's like a less entertaining Shaq, and you know what I think about Shaq. If inane ramblings and bad grammar is your thing, Rampage is your guy.
Twitxample:
"leaving Canada on my way to NY,i feel like a rapper on tour,but wit out da groupies! i wonder how many groupies did MC Hammer have? do u kno"
Chad Ochocinco
Remember in Hard Knocks, how Chad gets the news that the NFL and the team will be cracking down on Twitter, and he slowly closes his computer with a tear in his eye, as if he was done with it? Yeah...that didn't last long.
Ochocinco is still twittering, and he's doing it often. If you follow Ochocinco, you know you're going to get your phone blown up. And it won't be with anything useful, either. Instead, you get a nice picture of a guy who uses Twitter because he doesn't really know how else to connect with people.
Twitxample:
"Get yall tail<---(ass) up!!!! It's Friday and that means it's showtime,another lonely day at the movies, what comes out good today people?"
Michael Beasley
Yes, his Twitter account got deleted, but while it existed, it was definitely in the running for most idiotic ever.
"Super Cool Beas," as he called himself, definitely showed himself as being crazy long before he checked into rehab. Everything he said was followed by tons of exclamation marks!!!!!!!!!! He talked like a thurd grader!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh, and he mentioned thinking about starting his own ustream, which is athlete code for "about to have a breakdown."
Twitxample:
"My stomach hurt soo bad!!!!!!! Wat should I do!!!!!!! I already took a boo boo!!!! Lol but I'm still feelin bubbly!!!!"
Juan Pablo Montoya
Like Michael Beasley, Juan Pablo Montoya seems way too excited about everything he tweets. Excessive use of the exclamation mark wouldn't be so bad if he actually had something exciting or interesting to say.
Unfortunately, he does not, unless you count showering and eating.
Of course, this could automatically be upgraded to the best Twitter feed ever if he sent out a tweet during a race. If you think people go crazy about NBA and NFL players tweeting during games, how do you think they'll react if someone does it while driving?
Twitxample:
"havent shower yet, watching some tv but need to start getting ready for some media!! practice at noon!!!!!"
Bleacher Report
Just kidding. Bleacher Report's Twitter feed is awesome.
They post the best stories from the site as well as interesting stuff from around the Web. This is one account you should be following.
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