Brett Favre Announces His Retirement From Wrangler Jeans

Matthew ZivicContributor ISeptember 7, 2009

HOUSTON - AUGUST 31:  Quarterback Brett Favre #4 of the Minnesota Vikings talks with receiver Jaymar Johnson at Reliant Stadium on August 31, 2009 in Houston, Texas.  (Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images)

Brett Favre shocks the denim world today by announcing his retirement from Wrangler Jeans. Millions of hillbillies and middle aged men who get through their mid life crisis by playing backyard football with their dog were devastated today after hearing the news.

Cletus McKlintock from Ft. Cherry PA (outside of Pittsburgh), says that Brett was his hero he made Wrangler Jeans and shopping at KMART cool again. Cletus was in shock when he heard the news that Brett may sign with Levi's. Not that I have anything against Levi or his jeans says McKlintock but I just can't afford them or to shop at the high end stores that there sold in like Sears.

Tom Benton from Buffalo, NY says he too was in utter disarray when he heard the news. I was never able to father a son of my own to push my childhood failures on by pushing them into sports they didn't want to play says Benton. So backyard football with my friends is the last thing I have left and Brett is what made us feel young again.

No one knows what Brett is going to do next but I can assure you once again no one will care. ESPN will be the only ones keeping the story alive because once again baseball fails to fill the void.