Arlen Specter Reportedly Exhumes, Mistreats Eight Belles
According to breaking reports, Senator Arlen Specter, along with executives from ESPN and Comcast, was seen digging up the grave of the late Eight Belles this past weekend. Eight Belles was recently euthanized after a terrible on-track accident at the Kentucky Derby. There has been much gnashing of teeth as to the cruelty of horse-racing, but Specter's actions really have taken cruelty to a new level.
Eyewitness accounts state that after exhuming the horse, Specter and his buddies proceeded to beat the horse repeatedly. According to the Pennsylvania Senator's staff, he plans to continue this odd practice for "the foreseeable future".
Washington experts are still struggling to find a motive for the odd behavior, although some point to the involvement of Comcast and ESPN as a clue to the man's actions. While Comcast and ESPN have had serious issues with the NFL, Monday Night football and DirecTV, there is no known connection between them and the horse in question.
PETA and the ASPCA were unavailable for comment.
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