You Might Be A Chicago Baseball Fan In 2009 If...

Baseball fans in Chicago are frustrated. I could insert so many expletives about the White Sox (and I'm sure Cubs fans can do the same).

After both teams were in the playoffs last year, they're both stuck in a neutral form of (below) mediocrity right now.

Clearly neither team will make the postseason. Losing games to the Orioles and Nationals pretty much ended the season for both teams.

Here are five signs to tell if you're a Chicago baseball fan in 2009...

...You're better off playing without a second baseman

Mike Fontenot, Aaron Miles, Jeff Baker
Chris Getz, Jayson Nix, Brent Lillibridge

Talk about below mediocrity...

...Your right-handed "setup" man sucks

Scott Linebrink: 3-6, 3.97 ERA, 1.54 WHIP, 2 blown saves

Aaron Heilman: 2-3, 4.55 ERA, 1.52 WHIP, 6 blown saves

No two players put our teams through more brutal hell...

...You have an overpriced, under-performing outfielder

Alfonso Soriano: $17 million
.240 avg/19 HR/52 RBI

Alex Rios: $6.4 million
.258 avg/15 HR/64 RBI

We're all hoping for "next year" for both these players...

...Your rookie sensation became a sophomore bust

Alexei Ramirez: .273 avg/14 HR/57 RBI/.732 OPS/16 errors

Geovany Soto: .218 avg/9 HR/31 RBI/.705 OPS/29.2% CS

Being sued.... failing a pot test.... what the heck guys?

...Your manager has lost his fire

Seriously... what is up with them? They've both taken massive chill pills... and it's sickening!