Scott Podsednik Has Hit Four Home-Runs So Far: Is He On Steroids? (Satire)

Bleacher ReportSenior Analyst IAugust 1, 2009

--I must reiterate and reemphasize that this article is only for the purpose of humor.  It is meant to lampoon the issue of steroids and qualitative perceptions on when to wonder whether someone is juicing. In no way am I insinuating in any way that Scott Podsednik is juicing--

When I read the story about Jake Peavy approving his trade to Chicago, I checked the depth chart for the White Sox. I could not help but notice an anomalous stat: Centerfielder Scott Podsednik has hit four homeruns this season.

Count 'em... four longballs in the same exact season!

For a batter who had zero jacks in 2005 when the White Sox won the World Series, four homeruns seems like a suspiciously high jump. This is someone who has not hit more than three since the 2004 season.

In this age of steroids, can we trust such an enormous increase in pedestrian stats for a batter of Podsednik's age?

Compared to his one homerun in 2008, Podsednik has already increased his homeruns by 200 percent!

For a player whom has always been a jack of all trades and a master on the run, how can it be human that this runner would suddenly summon such power?

I can only imagine, now that David Ortiz and Manny Ramirez have been exposed, whom will be next in line to sully the success of a World Champion team.