Feminists are furious in the wake of an anonymous White Sox player attempting to motivate his team by using a blow-up doll in the clubhouse. “This is a blow to women everywhere,” said Jenni Carlson, president of the Association for Women in Sports Media. “Those of us who have worked hard to better ourselves are very angry and disappointed to see a facsimile of a woman acting as a slump-buster in the clubhouse when there are certainly many women in Chicago who would be happy to perform this service for a nominal fee.”
“It makes me sick,” she said.
Manager Ozzie Guillen defended the behavior in his clubhouse, saying, “I don’t [expletive deleted] know what that [expletive deleted] is [expletive deleted] talking the [expletive deleted] about. What the [expletive deleted] does that [expletive deleted] [expletive deleted] want? I mean, for the [expletive deleted] love of [expletive deleted] [expletive deleted] this is [expletive deleted] [expletive deleted].”
Carlson was eager to clarify her comments. “In this society, women make 75 cents for every dollar a man makes. We need to take every advantage we can to be employed and make money, and this is exactly the kind of behavior that needs to be stopped. You know who makes and benefits from those blow-up dolls? Men. If there’s going to be a display in the clubhouse that is offensive to women, it should involve actual women instead of just benefiting the entrenched phallic economy.”
Guillen’s response was nothing more than an unprintable string of profanity.
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