I apologize if this article doesn't turn out too great. My air conditioning broke, so I've been sweating all day, and I can't concentrate. Plus my pet turtle is sick, so I've been really distracted, and a ghost keeps sneaking into my room and rearranging my sentences.
Not buying it? Good.
In sports, the art of crafting a believable, sympathy-worthy excuse oftentimes becomes the most important skill for an athlete to master. Unfortunately—or fortunately, really—most athletes never master it.
It's not just the athletes, though, that come up with ridiculous excuses for things that happen on and off the field in the sports world. It's also all of you.
Indeed, athletes and fans together have been providing pathetically hilarious excuses for years—excuses for losses, excuses for cheating, excuses for injuring other players and much, much more.
Some of the most beautifully pathetic of these are listed here for your reading pleasure.
Anyway, I guess you can start clicking through the slides now.
I was going to have a better conclusion; I swear. But my dog just came in and deleted everything I wrote, and then I contracted an illness from its hair, which caused me to lose my memory and forget all my ideas.