Well, that was unexpected.
Germany, perhaps under the impression that multiple players can win the Golden Boot award, eviscerated a confused, listless Brazil side 7-1 to move on to the 2014 World Cup Final.
Thomas Mueller opened the scoring for Germany and is now within one goal of Colombia's James Rodriguez for the Golden Boot.
Miroslav Klose scored his 16th career World Cup goal, pushing him one tally clear of Ronaldo for sole possession of the all-time scoring record.
Here is the final scoring record from the game along with the updated Golden Boot standings, followed by a recap of the game's action.
|Matchup||Result||Germany Goals||Brazil Goals|
|Brazil vs. Germany||GER 7-1 BRA||Thomas Mueller 11', Miroslav Klose 23', Toni Kroos 24', 26, Sami Khedira 29', Andre Schuerrle 69', 79'||Oscar 90'|
|Robin van Persie||Netherlands||3|
|Clint Dempsey||United States||2|
|Wilfried Bony||Ivory Coast||2|
|Bryan Ruiz||Costa Rica||2|
|Angel Di Maria||Argentina||1|
|Kevin De Bruyne||Belgium||1|
|Julian Green||United States||1|
|Avdija Vrsajevic||Bosnia and Herzegovina||1|
|Lee Keun-Ho||South Korea||1|
|Joel Campbell||Costa Rica||1|
|Oscar Duarte||Costa Rica||1|
|Marcos Urena||Costa Rica||1|
|Stefan de Vrij||Netherlands||1|
|Vedad Ibisevic||Bosnia and Herzegovina||1|
|John Anthony Brooks||United States||1|
|Edin Dzeko||Bosnia and Herzegovina||1|
|Miralem Pjanic||Bosnia and Herzegovina||1|
|Son Heung Min||South Korea||1|
|Koo Jacheol||South Korea||1|
|Jermaine Jones||United States||1|
|Giovani dos Santos||Mexico||1|
Five goals in 18 minutes. That's all anyone needs to know to understand just how swiftly Brazil dissolved the hopes of a nation with its anemic play.
The Selecao knew they were in for a tough game without their talisman, Neymar, on the pitch, but no one could have expected this.
Mueller opened the scoring in the 11th minute with a sumptuous strike off a corner kick. He was left completely unmarked on that play, a sign of things to come.
Klose then notched his record-breaking goal with a rebound strike in the 23rd minute. This was the moment that truly marked the beginning of the rout.
Sports Illustrated's Grant Wahl couldn't find a straightforward explanation for this performance:
If you were throwing the game, you'd at least attempt to be trying, right?— Grant Wahl (@GrantWahl) July 8, 2014
The Brazil defense was in shambles, Luiz Gustavo and Fernandinho struggled to string together any passes, and the attacking contingent rarely had a touch of the ball during the nightmare stretch in the first half.
Squawka Football noted that center-back David Luiz was all over the pitch, to his team's detriment:
Toni Kroos scored twice in the span of three minutes, thanks to some lazy passing from Marcelo and abhorrent marking from Luiz. His strong interplay with Sami Khedira led to the latter getting a goal of his own to make the score 5-0 after 29 minutes of play.
Squawka Football accurately captured just how that deluge of goals felt:
Unfathomable. Hard to believe. When the ESPN cameras panned over the crowd, nearly every fan captured was in tears or lost in their own minds, a blank thousand-yard-stare down to the pitch where all the mayhem was taking place.
The New York Times' Sam Borden relayed the unbelievable scene at the stadium:
I never thought I'd say this: Brazilian fans are leaving, before halftime, of a World Cup semifinal in their home country. It's stunning.— Sam Borden (@SamBorden) July 8, 2014
Brazil, to its credit, mustered some strong attacks in the second half, but goalkeeper/wannabe sweeper Manuel Neuer made a pair of incredible saves to hold the clean sheet.
Andre Schuerrle then added insult to injury with a second-half brace to make the score 7-0 to Germany.
Oscar scored a rather perfunctory goal for Brazil in the 90th minute to deny the clean sheet at the very least.
Brazil coach Luiz Scolari let everyone know how he felt about the match, via Borden:
Scolari: "If I were to think of my life ... I think it was the worst day of my life."— Sam Borden (@SamBorden) July 8, 2014
Germany awaits the winner of the Argentina-Netherlands semifinal. Die Mannschaft will almost assuredly be considered the favorites for that match based on their dominating performance against the host nation.
The Brazilian squad has no chance to slip away from the spotlight, as they are now set to play in the third-place game on July 12 against the loser of Argentina-Netherlands.
A victory in that game would likely do next to nothing toward erasing this devastating loss from the country's memory. This game is now woven into the fabric of the team's history. There's always 2018 in Russia.