"There will be no sex in Brazil."
These are the words of Bosnia-Herzegovina manager Safet Susic, whose team is one of several international sides instituting sex-related rules for their players during the 2014 World Cup.
"I am not interested what the other coaches do," the Daily Star reports Susic as saying in April. "This is not a holiday trip, we are there to play football at the World Cup."
According to Eliana Dockterman of Time, Susic's no-sex stance is just one of the many sexual policies teams have rolled out for the tournament.
Russia, Chile and Mexico are among the other teams said to be levying a sexual cease-fire, but not every nation believes carnal pleasures are a ban-worthy distraction.
The United States, Switzerland, Italy and England are among several other nations with a free, no-strings-attached policy toward sex. Their players may do as they please. Several nations, however, are allowing sex with stipulations.
David Yanofsky of Quartz reports that Spain, Germany, France, Brazil, Costa Rica and Nigeria are among the nations that have developed rules for their athletes to abide by in the bedroom.
For Spain and Germany, sexual relations are allowed except for the night before a match—implying the old adage that sexual activity prior to competition can hurt performance on the field. It didn't seem to help Spain much. Costa Rica's rules, on the other hand, place sex on a pedestal by only allowing players to resume relations in the second round—a carrot on a stick, of sorts.
Things get more, well, specific when you get into Brazil's rules, which allow sex so long as it isn't "acrobatic." Similarly, France's policy gives players freedom to do as they please but advises against all-night affairs. Nigeria specifies that players can lay with their wives but not their girlfriends.
The idea of teams assuming the role of sexual referee sounds ridiculous—and it is. But it's indicative of the extreme lengths to which teams will go in order to gain an edge at the highest level of competition.
"World Cup fever" isn't just a buzz term—it's a real thing with real implications for the most intimate aspects of players' lives.
As to how teams will monitor and mete out repercussions for sexual rule-breakers, that's a question for another day. Perhaps a yellow card?
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