Rex Ryan has a big head in more ways than one.
Yes, his head looks like one of those giant vegetables that farmers grow so they can enter local agricultural contests and entertain themselves, but his ego has outgrown even his overgrown noggin.
His ego is a giant killer tomato—a mutant vegetable that any farmer would be thrilled to have until it bites their head off. And like the movie featuring these monstrous creatures, Rex Ryan is also full of nonsense.
Since taking over as head coach of the New York Jets, Ryan has already engaged in a verbal spat with a rival player, crowned himself king of the OTAs, and taken on the closest thing the AFC East has to a real king—Bill Belichick.
Ryan loves to hear himself talk, and the New York media appears to be slurping it up like a nice, big serving of tomato soup. However, these grandiose claims and predictions could very well backfire, and if they do, those same New York writers will be taking that big, bad killer tomato and dicing him up in the papers.
Ryan's mouth, to use another cliche, is writing a check it can't cash. A guy can talk up his team all he wants in June, but it doesn't make it reality.
Ryan and his team are already proclaiming themselves to be the "best and nastiest defense" in the AFC East. And this is before they even get in pads! Unless "nasty" is a reference to some hijinks involving sweaty dudes in jockstraps in the locker room, a mental image I think we all could go on without, especially where Ryan is involved, this proclamation is completely baseless and without merit.
If he took a moment away from his daily stand-up routines to take a look at his roster, he would notice that there is no man by the name of Ray Lewis on it to ensure a perennial top-10 defense.
Ryan's focus should be on preparing his team for the season, ensuring that every member of his team is ready physically and mentally for the long road ahead, not feeding their unquenchable egos with talk of visiting the White House after their multiple (imaginary) Super Bowl victories or inflaming rivals across the country.
If Ryan continues down this path, his players will be so full of themselves by the time the season starts, that they will not know how to cope with reality when it comes raining down upon them in a harsh hail of losses and miscues.
If you take a look at last year's successful rookie head coaches, none of them made such lofty proclamations at the beginning of their tenure. Yes, they all vowed to turn their teams around, but they took a day-to-day approach. Their message was, "Give your best effort each time you are on the field, whether at an OTA, training camp, pre-season, or the regular season, and eventually things will turn around for us."
None of them were openly planning their Super Bowl victory parade routes with their teams.
His most obvious blunder this offseason was when he incited a verbal sparring match with rival Miami Dolphins linebacker Channing Crowder. Even being so brash as to say that "if her were younger, he would handle [Crowder] himself."
I cannot recall the last time a coach openly engaged in trash talking with a rival player, especially in the offseason—months away from even facing the opponent. It is easy to see why no coaches before Ryan would ever bring themselves to enter such a fracas.
Why would a coach ever want to give an opposing player more motivation to stick it to their team? At best it is a strategic miscue, at worst it is a childish and irrational mentality that he carries which will make itself known during other critical moments of decision-making.
Don't get me wrong, Ryan was a great defensive coordinator, and will be again in the future, but there was a reason why one of the best talent evaluators in the business passed him over for an unproven position coach to take over his team. It is, because like other great coordinators before him, he just doesn't have the mentality of a top guy.
Could you ever picture Lombardi, Landry, Shula, or Belichick bringing themselves down to the level of a loudmouthed linebacker? There is a certain quiet yet forceful leadership and gravitas that these men carried, something that Ryan completely lacks.
Ryan will fail because he has this whole head coaching thing backwards. Do something, then talk. Don't talk before you do anything.
Rex Ryan has set himself up to drown in his own superfluous expectations—and the New York media will gleefully kick him in once they get any inkling that he isn't the Chosen One like Anakin Skywalker, to use another movie reference.
Although Rex Ryan might like to think of himself as Darth Vader, he looks more like Jabba the Hutt, and acts more like Jar-Jar Binks. It is my belief that he will end up just like all three of the aforementioned Star Wars characters—an epic failure.