The NBA had a rare night off Monday, presumably so players could enjoy $5.99 Burger & Brews at their local Applebee’s.
That, or watch the NCAA Men’s National Championship. Or maybe both. Basketball, beer and burgers. Sure, great. So long as they’re tweeting about the game and not including pictures of vaguely vegetarian dishes.
LeBron James kicked off the commentary festivities with this nifty little observation:
Pretty impressive dig, Mr. King James, especially considering you were, what, 12 years old when Arizona won the 1997 national championship, beating the…oh, no. They beat the Kentucky Wildcats. An omen, perhaps?
Tweeting in support of your alma mater can build up a hunger of course, which is why Kemba Walker—who led UConn to the title back in 2011—decided to get the biggest burger and beer possible…
What…what is that? That looks…healthy? Why? What did we just say about that?
So who are you watching the game with, Kemba?
Your teammate let you eat that!?
Not every Big Blue Nation supporter watched the game with the enemy like some sort of cheap traitor, of course:
OK, who let Metta World Peace in?
Of course, there were plenty of players without any direct school ties who had their own rooting interests, like the Atlanta Hawks’ Dennis Schroeder:
Someone likes his emoticons. And what’s with the thumbs down, anyway? Does that mean thumbs up in Germany?
When Kentucky freshman (is there any other kind of Kentuckian?) James Young threw down a nasty slam in traffic midway though the second half, a pair of Los Angeles Clippers were quick on the Twitter trigger:
Then Shabazz Napier started happening. Hard.
This wasn’t Shabazz’s first dance, remember:
Those glimpses of Kemba? Those are no accident, people.
UConn would hold on to capture its fourth national championship, 60-54 behind 22 points from Shabazz Napier, who—to no one’s surprise—took home the tournament’s Most Outstanding Player Award.
We thought DeMarcus Cousins might get so mad he'd snap a church in half, but he managed to shelve the rage.
And so ended one of the wackiest, zaniest, most unpredictable brackets in history. Congratulations to the Standford Cardinal. Wait, what?
Flawless logic, Landry Fields.
Yeah, alright, we get it.
Hey, I wonder what Kemba and MKG are up to.
Well played, Mr. Walker.
And really, what would a curated twitter account of tonight's action be without Dwight Howard making a fool of Terrence Jones?
Oh man, I bet Terrence is feeling like an idiot for agreeing to do that to his hair if Kentucky didn't...wait, he paid someone to do that? For fashion reasons? Terrence, go eat vegetables with Kemba.
I think we should probably end this on a happier note, yes? OK.