This Week in Annoying: The Worst in Sports Right Now
Let's pour one hot for Carlos Gonzalez's inability to dip without swallowing.
Welcome back to another edition of what's wrong in the sports world, a lighter look at some seriously entertaining stuff.
Leading the charge is the Rockies slugger who suffered some dizziness because he accidentally imbibed his dip spit, which is pretty much something we can go our whole lives without attempting.
Of course, we may have missed some excellent stuff out there, so please remedy that in the section below. And with that, let's take a look at some knuckleheads.
Carlos Gonzalez Suffers Dip Issues
Stick around MLB long enough, and you are going to see some fairly entertaining maladies. It seems Rockies slugger Carlos Gonzalez wanted to get his name in the early running for most absurd excuse to leave the game this week.
As MLB.com's Thomas Harding reports, Gonzalez is doing fine after suffering dizzy spells, which is a relief. It also gives us an opportunity to highlight what may have been the cause of his ailment.
Here is what Harding writes about the early departure Thursday:
Of course, as Gonzalez mentioned after the game and manager Walt Weiss noted Thursday, accidentally swallowing his smokeless tobacco could not have helped.
"I talked to him last night after the game and he assured me he was fine and was going to be all right, so it's a nice name to write in a lineup," Weiss said. "He might've swallowed some dip or something. He landed hard, knocked the wind out of himself, swallowed some dip, dehydration, all those things were factors."
Suddenly we are feeling a little woozy ourselves.
Junior Lake's Wardrobe Malfunction
The Chicago Cubs are off to a very Chicago Cubs start this season, dropping to 1-3 on the year. However, the most peculiar piece of evidence that all is once again wrong in Cub Land was written all over Junior Lake's chest recently.
The Internet had a nice chuckle at CBS Sports' Tom Fornelli's tweet on Thursday, showing Lake, who accidentally wore the wrong jersey.
Cubs beat writer Carrie Muskat later explained in a tweet, "Lake says he saw 2 gray jerseys in his locker, and just grabbed 1. Didn't know it was wrong until Grimm said something from 'pen."
Glad to see everything's as it should be.
This week welcomed the 2014 edition of April Fools' Day, which meant that pretty much every person in the world was trotting out their lame excuse for a prank.
There were, thankfully, a few that actually garnered a good laugh.
Go ahead and stick this one in that good pile. It features Takeru Kobayashi taking on the New York Cosmos' Peri Marosevic in a chicken wing-eating contest.
Of course, Marosevic has no clue it's actually Kobayashi, which leads to a fantastic reaction the moment the professional-eating star turns it on.
Prank of the Pitiful Variety
And then there was this attempt at April Fools' gold from the Atlanta Falcons.
The team's media department went around town, dishing random absurdities like Julio Jones leaving football to play baseball.
Reactions varied from general nonchalance to incredulity, never really garnering a noteworthy moment the entire three minutes.
We take that back, because at three minutes and 28 seconds, the video ends, so that was nice.
Chances are great that if you ever feature in a highlight video set to R. Kelly's "I Believe I Can Fly," you did something horribly wrong.
For proof, we give you Wichita State's Cleanthony Early, who doesn't quite stick the landing in the 2014 Denny's Slam Dunk Championship.
Well, he doesn't stick anything really.
(h/t Bleacher Report)