Minnesota Twins: Brad Radke Still Alive

MINNEAPOLIS, MN - Several shocked Twins players reported that pitcher Brad Radke, who retired in 2006, is apparently still alive. “Yeah, we were all just hanging out in the clubhouse talking one day,” said catcher Joe Mauer. “Raddy just walked right in. You should’ve seen the way some of the guys looked at him - it was like Scott [Baker] was seeing a ghost. We were pretty much just silent for a moment, then [Jason] Kubel said ‘I thought you were dead.’ Raddy laughed it off, and we did too, like it was a joke.”

Added Mauer, “I could’ve sworn he got hit by a bus.”

Radke, who retired in 2006, was well known around the baseball world for his remarkable control. On average, he issued 41 walks per year during his career, a figure remarkably similar to what Daniel Cabrera gives up per game. This excellent control was the reason he had come to the game; manager Ron Gardenhire enlisted Radke to discuss the importance of consistently throwing strikes with the pitching staff.

“Tell you the truth, it wasn’t really my idea,” said Gardenhire. “[Boof] Bonser had a start where he walked a bunch of guys, and I wanted to bring someone in to give the staff a talk. I couldn’t think of who it should be, but my wife suggested Raddy. I had no idea what he was doing. Honestly, I thought he got eaten by a bear.”

Radke’s talk was effective without being flashy. “Yeah, he’s not the best natural speaker,” said Gardenhire. “But he knows how to play to his strengths, get people’s attention okay, tell them what they need to know, and really get the job done. I was impressed with his ability to communicate despite having so many eyes on him and being under all that pressure.”

As for Radke himself, he was unimpressed with his outing to the Metrodome. “There’s a lot of things I could work on for next time,” he said. “I paid a little too much attention to the radio on my way over and my car drifted left a bit, so that was bad. I couldn’t find my old Twins hat like I wanted to and my hair was all over the place. But mostly I was a little distracted this morning. I mean, apparently I never drowned on Lake Superior during a fishing trip. Who knew?”