Welcome to the Onion Bag, your No. 1 destination for weird and wonderful football news.
First today, we head to Serie A, where Sassuolo striker Antonio Floro Flores has agreed to adopt a baby found abandoned on a train.
Next, it's over to the UK, where The Sun newspaper has started a war of words with Sunderland.
Finally, we jet to the Bernabeu, where Real Madrid fans have had the gall to boo their megastar hero Cristiano Ronaldo while they were up 4-0!