Random Ramblings About The Dallas Cowboys

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Random Ramblings About The Dallas Cowboys
(Photo by Ronald Martinez/Getty Images)

I had this nightmare last week about the Dallas Cowboys. It's early in the season and David Buehler is set to kick the ball off. But instead of drilling the ball out of the endzone for a touchback, he nails a laser beam right to the Cowboys sidelines, where it nearly decapitates head coach Wade Phillips. The opponent gets the ball at the 45-yard-line.

Phillips, unlike his father Bum, doesn't wear a big 100-gallon Stetson on the sidelines.

I hope it was just a dream. Frankly, the only controversy I'd like to see is Buehler and Nick Folk (the Cowboys' primarily placekicker) get into is a heated argument over which PAC-10 school is better. Buehler went to USC (which could probably beat some NFL teams) while Folk went to Arizona.

I'm relieved that Cowboys punter Mat McBriar is doing much better after recovering from the broken foot that he suffered last year in that embarrassing loss to Arizona. Dallas must have confidence in him since he's now the only kicker on the roster. Maybe drinking lots of Foster's Beer did it for McBriar, Texas' favorite Aussie.

Enjoy your training camp with the Cowboys, Rudy Carpenter. Rudy's a rookie free agent quarterback from the University of Arizona. I suspect his time in training camp will be as an insurance policy in case rookie Stephen McGee turns into Mr. Magoo when it comes to dropping back and reading defenses.

I keep thinking that next season, the Cowboys' new head coach will be Mike Shanahan--especially if Dallas misses the playoffs or takes a very inglorious early exit. Or if Phillips gets drunk and tells Jerry Jones, "Five hundred owners could run this team!"

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