The Cooperstown Juice Bar

(Photo by Jim McIsaac/Getty Images)

See, Manny's never been one that you'd suspect of juice because he's never had that retarded, where-the-hell-did-THAT-come-from power outburst season, like Bonds, Sosa, and McGwire. The guy's just been a hitting metronome, consistent beyond belief.

He slotted in between 33 and 45 home runs from '98 to '06 and hasn't batted under .290 in 15 years. This is another guy who would be absolutely first-ballot Hall of Famer if not for chemical testing.

And honestly, while the "I didn't know what it was" defense seems like a crock coming from body-obsessives like Bonds and A-Rod, I can almost see it as plausible coming from Manny, who's cultivated an airhead persona roughly akin to Jessica Simpson's.

Still, the fact that Manny is one of only two guys on this list who actually DID get officially nailed is the only factor that I automatically reward with a...DENIED

Rafael Palmeiro

This one pains me. A great career with no real age-related nosedives, all undone by what's become the most famous finger since Johnny Cash gave the ol' California Howdy to Jim Marshall at San Quentin in 1969.

Getting suspended for doing steroids after this kind of career is sad.

Getting suspended for doing steroids after giving Congress this finger wag...well, to be honest, it's pretty fucking hilarious.

Fact remains, much as I love Raffy, my criteria is that I'll consider you as long as you didn't get suspended. Well, Raffy did. DENIED

Sammy Sosa

Sammy was a tough one...well, until yesterday. I want to come down on him for not being a big banger pre-1998 Maris chase...but he'd hit 170 jacks his previous five seasons, supplementing that with 132 steals. However, pre-1998, he'd tended to wear down late in the season.

September '93: 101 AB, .248 avg., 4 HR

September '95: 108 AB, .231 avg., 6 HR

August '96: 69 AB, .217 avg., 4 HR (sat out September with injury)

June-August '97: 340 AB, .226 avg., 17 HR

He also tailed off badly in 1999, batting only .229 in September and once again falling short of McGwire in the home run race.

The overall point, though, was that a pattern began forming for a guy who could have really good seasons, but seemed to wear down at some point every year.

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