Dear Matt Walsh and Roger Goodell: No One Cares!

Spygate has resurrected into the mainstream media. Ron Johnson has had enough of this joke.

by Ron Johnson (Senior Writer)

10 comments

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April 24, 2008

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Humor, NFL Draft, NFL, New England Patriots, Oakland Raiders, Bill Belichick, Roger Goodell, Los Angeles Sports, 2008 NFL Draft, Spygate, Matt Walsh, Breaking News, NFL Draft Challenge

To: Bill Belichick, Head Coach of New England Patriots, Roger Goodell Castro, NFL Commissioner, and Matt Walsh, former Patriots Assistant & President and Founder of Jose Canseco Fan Club

From: Ron Johnson, Senior Writer, Bleacher Report

RE: Spygate

Gentlemen:

For six years, I have had to fume over my last trip to the Super Bowl. It was in New Orleans, and I watched as my beloved Rams fell to the New England Patriots 20-17. Now just when I thought I was completely healed from the burns I received from that game, you three idiots relight the fire.

In all honesty, and I speak for every football fan out there right now, we don't really care about it anymore. We have focused our attention on this weekend's draft, which is what at least two of you are supposed to be doing. The problem is that you have your heads so far up your own asses that you can't make heads or tails of this entire debacle that you call "Spygate."

As an avid and loyal supporter of the NFL, as well as the world of sports, it's become clear that the bozos who make the laws in Washington are more focused on ruining a good gameday for me. First was the steroids probe started by Jose Canseco and Mark McGwire. Then came Marion Jones. Then "Spygate" comes along and sidetracks them if only for a brief moment. The issue I have is that when you levied your penalty, Mr. Castro, we thought that it was over and dead.

Unfortunately, there was one more snitch still breathing in the prison yard. How that happened I don't know, but it did. 

Now I'm sure that you are happy that like our President of the United States, some debacle comes out of nowhere at the most opportune time. The opportune time I'm referring to is the fact that you managed to get yourself chastised in the worst way and by the most surprising people: Us, the football fans.

What makes it worse is that you get some disgruntled computer geek to do your dirty work. Matt Walsh is nothing more than a guy trying to earn his 15 seconds of fame by bringing down arguably the greatest dynasty of this era, the New England Patriots. And what proof has Mr. Walsh promised to deliver?

A tape of the Rams walkthrough from that very Super Bowl I attended. Word?

Before your date with Walsh on May 13th (and yes, I mean that kind of date), you have to ask yourself this question Mr. Castro: Is all this even worth the thousands of alka seltzers you'll be consuming and millions of dollars you'll be spending to find out if it's legit or not? I mean, seriously, what exactly can you do about that Super Bowl?

IT WAS SIX YEARS AGO!!

Are you going to reverse the score so that it shows the Rams as Super Bowl Champions? No. Are you going to suspend the entire 2001-02 roster of the Patriots for one whole season like Pacman Jones? Doubtful. Are you going to make Bill Belichick bend over and take it up the rear like Ricky Williams, Jones, Michael Vick, and Chris Henry? Probably not. So what exactly are you going to do if the information is legitimate?

The answer? Not a damn thing. There is nothing you can do because your credibility is already shot. If you were that anxious to find out the truth, this date you have wouldn't be happening on May 13th. It would be happening on April 24, 2008. But you don't want to know the truth, obviously. You just want someone to take the fall for your stupidity.

Walsh is slowly but surely becoming the most hated man in the New England colonies, but not as much as you. Patriots fans are still not happy with you smiling and gleaming as you handed Lord Lombardi's Trophy to the New York Giants. In fact, they're not happy with you taking away the first round draft pick that their team earned.

To top it all off, they're not happy with you actually taking time to listen to what Walsh has to say. 

But you are going to hear him out. Though it is the dumbest move you made since allowing Brett Favre to retire and letting the Bengals sit their only true hope of a postseason berth (No offense, TJ), you are going to listen to him. If you want to commit career suicide, that's your business. But you shouldn't drag the rest of us through the mud.

We're actually moving on from the scandal that rocked Boston. Since I am a Rams fan (and have been since birth), I do have the right to speak up and demand that you let it go. Because no matter what you say or do afterwards, the hurt and pain will still be there, and all of the Los Angeles/St. Louis Rams fans everywhere will have to deal with this situation.

You'll just move on and focus on new and exciting scandals to tarnish the hard work and true grit that 32 professional football teams exuberated through four months and 16 Sundays. 

Honestly Mr. Walsh, you are nothing more than a lackey for Castro. The very thought of you disgusts me and insults what little patience I have for this entire situation. I honestly hope that you move to Oakland and the Raiders fans drag you into the Black Hole, beat you senseless, and deliver an "Other Side of the Bay" Wedgie on a goal post.

As for you Mr. Belichick, I hope that you learned that not even you, the "God of New England,"  is above the iron fist of Castro. I hope that next season you do finish undefeated and win the Super Bowl to not only silence those damn '72 Dolphins that are still not in retirement homes, but also figuratively speaking tell Goodell Castro to kiss your ass. 

And last, and certainly least, Mr. Castro. I don't care how many law degrees you got or how many women you slept with to get your job, you absolutely suck at this position of NFL Commissioner. Granted, Paul Tagliabue was not my favorite, but at least he had the balls to deal with the entire situation when it was current. Now you're just dragging this big steaming pile of New England B.S. through our TV sets and dumping it on our chests to consume and enjoy.

I for one will not stand for the ignorance of the upper management of the NFL, and I know that there are several NFL fans who won't either. We are truthful when we say that we don't care about Spygate anymore. We are truthful when we say that we could give a rat's ass whether the practices were taped.

Next thing you know, you'll be telling us that Walsh has evidence that shows that my kid's 1st birthday party was caught on video and he wants me to be fined and suspended. But just like Spygate and the Dee-Dee-Dee moments that have come with it: NO ONE CARES!

So gentlemen, as a football fan, I ask you to please let it go. Not just for yourselves, but for the fans who freezed their balls off to watch Brett's last ride. For the fans who suffered through their teams' dismal shortcomings. For the fans who had to deal with Jessica and Giselle all season. For the young fans who are attending their first games with their dads. Do it for us, the football fanatics. If not for us, do it anyway.

Because we let it go after the Super Bowl. Why can't you?

With Deepest Regret,

Ron Johnson 

comments (10) write a comment »

  1. good article, ron (not sure if that is your real name, or the stereo salesman from Fast Times at Ridgemont High). i agree with some, disagree with some.

    i am a patriots fan, but i will say this. I care. I want to know what happened. And I believe nothing happened. it is hard to find a less credible person than matt walsh, yet most of the country, fueld by their hatred of the patriots, have latched onto him as if he is a noble peon, trying to take down the mighty, evil patriots.

    i just want to know the truth. and sadly, when this is all said and done, we will have gotten nowhere. regardless of what happens on 5/13, patrtiot fans will still say this is an unfounded attack, non-patriot fans will still say they are cheaters.

    i do agree with the commish on one thing. taping defensive signals, which are in plain view out in the open for anyone to see anyway, is one thing; taping a practice is a completely different matter. the original issue of "spygate" has been overblown, but if they did tape a walkthrough, and i highly doubt they did, i would be very hurt, for one of the happiest moments of my sports life as a fan, will have been tainted.

  2. You and me both Andy.

  3. Dear Ron Johnson,

    Thank you for putting into words what I have been saying all along. Something tells me Congress should have bigger things to be worried about than a supposed videotaping that happened six years ago. Great article.

  4. Dear JJ,
    You, and every football fan that has felt this way, are very welcome. The pleasure was all mine.

  5. Wonderful. Truly Wonderful.

  6. The commish has handled this situation terribly. he burst on the scene, trying to make a name for himself as the get tough no nonsense kind of guy. but he has failed at that. instead of being more like the iron fisted david stern, he is starting to appear to be more like the spineless bud selig. the nba found out about a ref involved in a betting scandal, and somehow stern was able to put that all to rest with one press conference. goodell would rather drag everything out, in his attempt to show who is in charge. also, remember in mid march the nfl said they were close to an agreement - yet it got dragged out for another month, until a few days before the draft. how could the commish allow this to linger this long? and what happens on may 14 - i surely hope that one way or the other, we can put this entire thing behind us on that day. but if the past is any indication, i doubt that is going to happen.

  7. Like Stew and Andy, I'm a Pats fan, if the Pats really did something, then I will be hurt and kinda angry, but until then, nothing has been proven about the Patriots supposedly taping a practice. Yes Goodell has blown this way out of proportion, which gave bitter eagles fan and Pennsyllvania Senator Arlen Specter a chance to blow it even higher. It's simply sickening how overblown this whole issue really was, especially considering that even if Belichick is caught, Paul Tagliabue did not enforce any rule sipulating a ban on taping, which will mean that Goodell is acting outside of his jurisdiction here, he can punish the Pats for what they did while he was in charge, nothing more.

    I agree with Andy, I just want to know what happened, regardless of this blatant posturing maneuver by Castro or Walsh looking for his 15 minutes of fame (reminds me of Lance Armstrong's personal trainer who supposedly found roids in Lance Armstrong's house, Mike Anderson I think his name was.

    I too want to see the '72 dolphins finally ride off into the sunset (you don't see the '01 mariners or '96 Bulls mouthing off when their records are in jeopardy) and I really don't care who goes undefeated, honestly, if it isn't my Patriots, I hope it's Detroit, San Fran or St.Louis, call me crazy but i love feel good stories.

  8. For the first time I feel there is hope for the whole "spygate" debacle. I agree with just about everything said from top of the article down to Max's line about wanting anyone to go undefeated just to shut up those '72 Dolphins. But I also have hope that something positive will come out of that meeting, that positive thing being Goodell coming out and anouncing that there is no tape and the whole thing is a dead issue. If its anything else than I know as a Patriots fan I will never see my team experience any success under Belichik without someone bringing up "spygate". If there was a tape of that walkthrough then people will make a huge fuss about wanting to go back and change things or doing other things equally rediculous. The worst part of that is it won't be the fans who say these things but the members of the media who want us to look at them, guys just trying to get a shot at the spot light by taking on one of the leagues best franchises. I also have to say I won't feel hurt or angry if that tape turns out to be real, especially since if we're being, I mean exactly how much can you tell from guys simply walking through the plays. I mean this is the kind of walkthrough thats not done on a practice field in pads at full speed or even quarter speed. The walkthrough that was "taped" was done in a hotel, and if the Rams players are anything like most other players in the league this guys are there in their nice clothes. However back to my original point, it's good to see I'm not the only sports fan out there just ready for this to become a dead issue. Good article and kudos on those respones

  9. i just cannot wait for arlon spector to go after the 49ers for tampering, and after jake peavy for scuffing the baseball. i mean, he is such a dogged peursuer of truth and fair play, i am sure he will go after them as soon as he is done with the patriots.

    1. Nahhhh, none of those guys ever hurt his precious Eagles like the big bad Patriots did... I'm surprised he didn't go after TO when he left Mcnabb out to dry. Besides... aren't there a more important set of destroyed tapes for congress to look into *cough* CIA torture tapes *cough* *cough*, not for this idiot apparently.

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